Tuesday, December 30, 2008

The best antiques are old friends.

CC's post (right below) inspired me to finally make another appearance on our lovely blog...(so sorry for the neglect... and ill spare you guys the excuses)

While I was in CC's car today on the way to my house, she said something like "You do realize this summer will be our last, right?"....
I had to ignore that annoying (yet most likely true) statement....
I gave no response then but her words stuck in my mind and its the irritating kind of stuck, like when you were a kid and got gum all in your hair....(Actually, I never did I just always saw that on TV)

But honestly, no matter where your friends end up if you truly have a bond and respect and longing for one another then there will always be a way to stay connected. And in this cyber-world...pffft that's not even an issue...This is what I always say...

Like when you graduate High School, everyone buys those silly yearbooks and during the last few days together you spend time signing each others yearbooks, leaving phone numbers, email addresses... writing the same old "Stay sweet" or "Keep in touch" messages. How many of those people do you still talk to today?
It all depends on your own interest in maintaining a certain relationship... but it IS possible to keep ties....

One of my friends moved on to a different college than I did...We've kept in touch for the past 4 years through emails and once in a blue-moon phone calls (actually I think only ONCE in the entire 4 years)...a few months ago we even met up for coffee and that meeting turned into 4 hours of chatting, catching up, sharing stories and doing what I had always loved in our friendship: laughing.
I realized even though a lot had changed about who we were, our friendship and interaction was still the same.

Another one of my closest and dearest friendships was maintained mostly over the phone...even though my friend and I attended the same middle and high schools. In all those years we had maybe 1 class together and because our school (building) was small but population was large there were 3 separate lunches, so somehow I never had the same lunch-time as she did...STILL we remained best of friends throughout school. We parted ways after graduation ...attended different colleges...studied in different programs...she got married... i remained single ... she moved on to start a family, had a baby...i... still...remained...single...
OK lets not dwell on my single-ness...the point is we got even closer even though we had fewer and fewer things in common as time went on. There was always something that bonded us and that was our mutual appreciation of one another...

And so that brings me to this point: it takes TWO to tango and its a TWO-WAY road....I've had friendships that started off with a bang and we were always together and enjoying each other's company and then it all started to dwindle and die away even though we still saw each other everyday. So as long as the feeling exists in both people, the bond will continue no matter the huge physical distance between you or the small amount of shared time together....

Ok, now I feel better...do you?

Monday, December 29, 2008

Thoughts on change-(not the money kind)

I thought I should share this with our readers.
Simply Me, one of our authors, who doesn't write but nevertheless for some reason holds the title of an author, got married on Saturday.

Some of the authors on this blog and myself have all been really good friends with Simply Me for five years now, since Freshman year of undergrad. So the wedding was a an extremely bitter-sweet occasion, even though she's gonna be with us for another semester.

The wedding was a reminder to all of us. The time we spent with each other, learning to be better people or gaining a fashion sense, our useless jokes, getting high off of each others' stupidity, taking turns crying during finals, and sometimes seven of us relying on a single person for class notes of an entire semester (usually it's me, relying on Simply Me for everything concerning our classes... it worked in the end..usually)-this was all coming to an end, and fast.

The fact that we knew S.M. was moving away later was the painful part of the wedding. Even though it was later, we already felt like we were losing her-after all, a major part of her has changed. Some of us shed tears, others occupied themselves with things during the wedding, and others were just purely happy. It's not just S.M. that we know will be moving on, it's most of us-going away for grad school, or starting their careers or whatever else fate has in store for us.

Maybe it's not so much that things are changing, or life is changing, but more of us, people, changing.

Everyone goes through those points where their lives are changing, and they might be losing those who are dear to them, and it's easy to slip into a sulking mode or become overcome by the fear that change will bring to our lives. Like how I was terrified of entering high school, and then again when I was starting college (but both did turn out to be good experiences).

So, we have two options when it comes to the changes in our life-taking it positively or looking at it negatively. Either way we know change is inevitable and change is never comfortable. And whether or not you want to accept it, life is still changing. So the only thing you can do is accept it, and turn it around for yourself. All because change is inevitable does not mean you don't have at least some control over it.

"The way some thing never changes shines a light on the things that do. Like when a new person comes into the hospital to stay or an old friend leaves for good.
Sometimes the biggest changes are the result of an impulsive decision.
And so here I am, a guy in an empty apartment, with a dead dog. And no that's not a tear on my cheek, that's just from a leak in my ceiling. And yes, change is scary but it's also inevitable. And so it's up to you to make the best of it. "
JD - Scrubs
( I just love Scrubs)

Only problem is, it's easier said than done. Hey, but if things were easy, it really wouldn't be much of a life. Just an easy one. Who's ever heard of that?

Wanted to share a picture of Simply Me's cake table :)

Friday, December 26, 2008


I feel like writing about myself. Kind of like an introduction AFTER what? 20-something posts {that's it?}? Especially since I don't know one or two authors on this blog?

I was born and raised in Michigan and went to college with most of the people on this blog. I wanted to become a doctor but decided it was way too long for me with premed and not having a guarantee of getting in. What would I do then? So I decided to major in nutrition. Then the idea of doing med school outside of America came up and I thought about it and the pros outweighed the cons and I ended up moving to India for med school. It's been three and a half years and I'm almost done, God Willing. I'll be back in America for residency and everything.

Living in India isn't easy. It took me about two years to adjust to a comfortable level and I still doubt whether I fit in completely or not. The traffic here is crazy so it's almost impossible to drive {I have a driver} and the easy life I had in America isn't here anymore. Yes, I have a maid and a cook and can sit at home and have everything get done for me {aside from school} but it's not the same. I hate the dependency. I CAN be independent and do everything on my own but then that takes a lot more time. You have to live here, not visit, to know what I'm talking about.

My name is FallingUp. There are two reasons why I chose that name: I fall up the stairs, especially in public places; and I feel like I'm falling in life when I'm really moving my way up. I'm stuck in India while everyone else is graduating and moving on with their life and getting married and etc. But I'm still here. The same. When in reality I'm almost a year and a half away from becoming a doctor when most people my age are trying to get into med school. Don't hate me for reminding you guys. ::ducks::

Right now the weather in India is 79 degrees Fahrenheit. Jealous? I'm wearing a white t-shirt, fuzzy pants and a SWEATSHIRT. I'm cold. Is something wrong with me? I used to drive in winter with the windows down. I used to love the cold even though my hands would turn purple and zombie-like.

Right now I have the fan off, windows closed and am contemplating putting on socks.

That was a very brief history of who I am. Just thought I'd let you know. Any questions?

Thursday, December 25, 2008

My day on Christmas Eve

I remember always making it a point to everyone that I would NEVER eat sushi.
I mean its raw meat! That's disgusting!!

Food is meant to be cooked! (At least meat is )
That's why the caveman (or woman) invented FIRE ! I mean the poor guy (or lady) went through all that trouble of accidentally igniting fire and realizing that food tasted BETTER when it was cooked. And here we are, trying to go back to the times of raw edibles.


And everyone's always talking about sushi. About how they love sushi, or it's their favorite food and its mentioned a couple thousand times in random books . And everytime I would wonder if the fact that it had raw meat just skipped past everyone.

Many, many, many years later(like a year ago), I'm told there's also cooked sushi. So I did some research about it couple months ago and found out it 's called "California Roll", and it was basically an American invention, because the thought of raw meat didn't sit well with American culture (which I really don't see, I mean everyone loves the infamous sushi).

Then a couple weeks ago, I'm starting to crave the taste of sushi. I've never tried it before, but something about the way a couple of my friends talked about it just triggered some random taste buds; and I really wanted to eat sushi-and I could, since America gave birth to the great "California Roll". The problem was getting sushi.

Lo and Behold! Kroger superstore to the rescue! Seriously Kroger is AMAZING (if you don't have one in your local neighborhood.....well you should). They're getting all high-tech/advanced now with their latest installments of a sushi bar, salad and soup bars and other freshly made food items and Much, Much More.

Anyways, so taking advantage of the fact that today(christmas eve) is my older brother's birthday I decided to gift him with Sushi from Kroger. You have no idea how excited I was looking at the little, colorful trays of sushi, and then carefully picking out the best looking California Roll and Vegetarian tray. Of course I knew he would have to share the sushi with us immediately after opening it. So I just had to give it to him right before dinner. Which I did.

As a self-proclaimed partial genius, of course my plan worked out perfectly. I just had to stop him from putting his sushi away in the fridge, and
forced him to share it.

So there I was, happily staring at my little circular balls of rice. I even yelled out Itadakimasu ( a japanese saying before a meal-roughly like saying bon appétit)-convinced this was the closest I was ever going to get to Japan. Dipping it in the sauce that was given with the sushi, I popped it into my mouth and


Mother: What's wrong with you?! Don't be disrespectful towards food! That's very unIslamic.
Brother #2: Apparently you either love it or hate it. I think it's really good
Birthday Brother: What are you talking about? It's really good
Me (completely, but not purposely ignoring my mother): OMG! Get the taste out! Get it out of my mouth! Blech Blech! Eww waaaaaaahhh
Brother #2: If you don't want it, I'll take it.

Reaches over to grab the other sushi off my plate
I see my brother reaching over and pop the other one into my mouth

Brother #2: Hey! I thought you said you hated it!
Me: Waaaaaaahhhh. I couldn't help it, it was a reflex! Blech. This is so Nas....ahhh
It's cuz you guys always eat my food! Ahhh get the taste out my mouth!
(If this doesn't make any sense to you, it will if you have brothers that are substitutes for garbage disposals and you have to develop a self-defensive reflex for all the food that disappears off your plate, whether or not you want it to. Not to mention I didn't wanna miss taking the risk of maybe the next one tasting better)

So that was it, my horrible sushi experience. Apparently it was because I used the sauce and no one else did. Yeah, Ok.
But for the record, I am sorry for making rude commentary about it. I was just overwhelmed...by the taste..... of the sauce?

And I'm not the only weird one in my family if that's what you're thinking. I screwed up making the cake for my birthday brother, and so some parts of it didn't have icing. Not a big deal right?

I see my brother eating a piece of cake and he gets up to get some water. On his way he throws away the rest of the piece he was eating

Me: HEY! What the heck! What did you just throw away?
Birthday Brother: It was a small piece of the cake
Birthday Brother: Oh, because it didn't have any icing on it.
Me: Are you freakin kidding me?
Brother #3 (a.k.a. C): hahaha Oooooh you're gonna go to hell. God's gonna ask you on the day of judgement* why you wasted food, and THAT'S what you're gonna say??!! hahaha

So that was my day on Christmas Eve. If you're confused why we weren't spending the time at Church or a big family dinner, it's because Muslims don't celebrate Christmas. So the biggest affect Christmas Eve has on my family usually----having to deal with a closed Kroger.

*Day of Judgment: According to Islamic belief (and most other monotheistic religions) , this is the day we are all resurrected from the dead and judged for our actions and given accounts of all our good and bad deeds.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Sisterly Love

My youngest sister and I got into a fight today. This is nothing new. Nor will it ever get old.

I have four sisters (and one brother), and for as long as I can remember, we've always gotten into really stupid, idiotic, and pointless fights.

Just like all sisters do, I'm sure.

Today's fight was over who would clean the upstairs- part of the house, and who wouldn't. Youngest sister, Fish, insisted that I do it. I didnt agree, so I hit her with a bag. She retaliated by throwing apple juice at me.

One time my oldest sister, Marjnhomer, and I were playing Monopoly. I think while playing it I was the "banker" or something and was supposed to distribute the money. She found out I was giving myself more money. She got mad at that. And at the fact that I was obviously winning. So she started shouting at me.And had the audacity to call me a cheater! I told her the game was getting boring and got up to leave. And I couldnt stop laughing at her. Like I was seriously laughing hysterically at her and the fact that she had to put all the monopoly pieces back in the box. All by herself. And I was just going to watch her do it. She wasnt too pleased with being laughed at, so she attacked me. And we started fighting.

And remember K.Ci and Jojo? And their song "Crazy". Well a long time ago, sister # 2, Chuckle, accussed me of being obsessed with them and their song. I have never been, nor will I ever be, obsessed with K-Ci and Jojo. Sure their one hit wonder was pretty good, but other than that, I dont care much for them. I got irritated with her saying that and started shrieking that I wasn't. Anyways one thing led to another and the next thing I know, we're trying to kill each other. I think I grabbed her hair first. I always go for the hair.

Hair pulling has usually been my tactic.(Yeah, yeah, I know. I'm such a girl. Get over it.)

Of course, they have tactics of their own though.

Once Chuckle pulled the chair out from under me and I fell. Hard. And I was extremely embarrased. So, I punched her in the nose after that.

She also threw an OPEN bottle of syrup at me, another time.

It took me a LONG time to get that syrup out of my hair.

And another time, Muth, my second to youngest sister, threw a battery at me.

<----That kind of battery. I acted fast though. I was like George Bush when the shoes came flying at him. She missed and broke my mom's china cabinet instead. I would much rather have had the battery hit me in the face, then deal with my mother's wrath. Hell hath no fury, like a mom scorned.

Another time, Muth kicked me. Kicked me in the mouth.

The result of this: I have a chipped front tooth.

We're not violent people though. I swear. And I can prove it.

My sisters' latest tactic: Hugs.

This is probably their best tactic thus far, because I'm not much of a hugger. Dont really like hugs. Especially from them.

You see how this will work to their advantage?

Saturday, December 20, 2008


Life is kinda dull right now, isn't it? Or at least it has been here at Symphonic Discord. Well, just to let all of you avid readers know, we've been a tad busy with exams lately.

But alas, finals are done. Grades have been posted. Tears have been shed. And life can go on.

And we can get back to more important things in life---like writing and entertaining all (four) of you!

My semester ended rather, interestingly. Student teaching finished a week ago. And I left the school with five bags of gifts, a balloon, and $100 worth of gift cards. It was like Christmas.

It was more or less, an amazing semester. As far as student teaching is concerned. Thank God. And I'm glad student teaching ended the way it did..

So without further ado, I would just like to share with you the amount of money I spent this entire semester on anything and everything student teaching related..So here it is: My last student teaching post!!!

(I know you all have been waiting eagerly and patiently for it.)

Tuition Bill......$6000 (I had a heart attack when I saw the bill. I thought " Well I'm only taking two classes so it cant be that much. Can it? But it turns out, its not how many classes you take, but how many credits you take! DUH! It only took me FOUR years to finally comprehend this)

All the supplies needed for my professional portfolio.....$150

Endless shopping for hot "teacher" clothes.......$300

New coat to match my "teacher" clothes.....$80

Ink cartridges for the endless lesson plans that needed to be printed..........$65

Putting gas into my car for the past four months with my pathetic "salary".......$300

Candy and treats for the brats.......$200

Food for my "Farewell" Party......$75

Gift for Ms. D, my cooperating teacher......$30

Parking ticket because I'm too cheap to pay $2.25 to park in the campus structure........$20 (This is what happens when you're frugal)

Asking my students if they would miss me when I left, and having one girl respond "Nooooooooo"...................Priceless

A student asking me to write to her when I get back to my home country of "Balilidish"...........Priceless

Getting over my fear of driving by commuting to this school for the past four months..........Priceless

Presenting my professional portfolio to the College of Education, only to have the faculty member nod off during it............Priceless

Looking through the personal messages/cards from students and reading one that had "I love you with all my heart and soul" erased..........Priceless

Being compared to a cheerleader.........Priceless

The students asking me "Since it's your last day, do we get to see your hair?"..........Priceless

Consistently being asked if I was Indian, from India, spoke Indian or anything else India-related.....Priceless

Seeing (and smelling) my fair share of kids using the bathroom on themselves......Priceless

Ms. D trying to explain to the students that I look like someone from Aladdin (without my hijab/headscarf), only to have one of the students cut her off and ask me "You look like Aladdin?"...........Priceless

Being asked by one of my students if I had to take a plane home.........Priceless

Being told that I look "creepy" with that thing on my head........Priceless

Often times being mistaken for a dedicated parent (I cringe at this thought) as opposed to a student teacher.........Priceless

Having something to complain...err....write about on this blog for the past four months......Priceless

Freaking out and spending an endless amount of time on a portfolio that was not even touched or perused through, by my evaluators........Pricefreakingless

Being told during my portfolio presentation by my evaluator that I speak "really good" English............Priceless

And lastly, being told that I was going to make a fine teacher by the former student teaching director..and finally FINALLY believing it myself............ Priceless

There are some things money cant buy. For everything else there's humor.

And sarcasm.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Med School Diaries: The Lockout

It was 9:45 AM and I just finished climbing the stairs to the room opposite the exam hall. Something tells me I should check to see if the Head of Department of ENT is there, so I take a quick peep into the exam hall. He's sitting there with a bored expression on his face. I know him well enough to not keep him waiting, even though everyone else is. So my sister and I go and sit in the hall and wait for the exam to commence.

As soon as I sit down I hear him tell the attender to shut the doors. He starts reading the exam questions out loud and tells us to write them down. I was confused because there were only about 30-40 of us in the room. I turn around behind me after the dictation and see about 70 students waiting outside trying to get past the glass doors. It was such a sorry sight. I know who missed the exam. These are people who work their butts off and probably didn't sleep at all the night before while I passed out at two.

I really felt bad. I thought he'd let them in after half an hour or an hour. But no. I walked out of the exam two hours later and it was sooo depressing. I'd hate to be in that position. I lucked out big time. I think only a third of my class was able to take the exam.

It was sad but really funny at the same time. Just humorous in that SO MANY students got locked out and I kept looking back and they were standing there for sooo long outside waiting, hoping for a sign. They got one. The Head got up, walked out to them, yelled a bit and told them to go home.

But I didn't get away without some scratches. He's deducting five marks from all but four students who took the exam for not coming "on time". He started the exam early!! How can he do that? This is India. And these are the crazies in it.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Girls, just play dead !!!!!

So I found this video that I think is cute, funny and sheds light on a very serious issue.

Fine, it's not that serious of an issue but it could be!

Basically without any of us realizing it, Disney has been teaching us how to get a man from a very early age.
I mean, I guess I would want to thank Disney for helping us all out with this highly imperative task. I mean all these years, and women are still looking to magazines for help on how to catch the man of their dreams (.....or at least some of us are) and Disney movies were like our training wheels.

For those of you who missed out on your training wheels or need a refresher course, or just a cause to march to Washington (or Orlando) about, have I found the thing for you!
I discovered this ingenious video on How to make a guy like you-Disney Princess Style !


Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Monday, December 8, 2008

I think there's something wrong with me

So finals are coming up and I am oddly not stressed. Whatever I got this, i'm taking International relations and Chinese- so yeah finals aren't that bad. But what is sort of driving me crazy is that for the past 4 days i've been fantasizing about baking these delicious butter cakes (butter cupcakes), with a buttercream frosting and I swear everytime I make up my mind to do it, something comes up. So you might ask, what's the problem you'll get to it when you get to it? Well it's bigger than just baking these cupcakes, I don't know if any of you noticed but i've gone on hiatus from politics- and for me that was my drug I mean I literally got off on reading up on the politics of the day and then reading up on the commentary of the politics of the day! I know, sad. But I think I burnt myself out with this past campaign- seriously for 22 months I knew exactly what was going on, who it was going on with, and if it would work. Now, i'm just like GET AWAY FROM ME!

So you can see my problem now is I have no idea what to do with myself. I mean I have hobbies and stuff but it's like I need my politics fix, but the idea that I need to read the news makes me think that I should wean myself off of it. So I guess i'm just going through some sort of withdrawal at the moment- which involves lots and lots of baking! Sorry if this made nooooo sense what so ever but I did have an eventual point for this post, Walnut Raisin Rice! (lol).

I love rice, and I love to snack- so I thought why not find a rice/snack recipe?? So I did, and it is yummmy and oh so simple.

Cooked long grain rice - 2 cups, I used Basmati
Walnuts - a big handful
Raisins - 2 tbsp
Olive oil - 1 tbsp
Lemon juice - 1 tsp
Salt - about 1 tsp

Put the walnuts in a zip lock bag and crush them lightly using a rolling pin. Place the crushed walnuts in a pan and toast on medium heat till they are slightly browned. Be careful not to burn the nuts. When the nuts are done, add all remaining ingredients to the pan and mix well. You could use any combination of nuts and dried fruit, like pine nuts and cranberries for example and it would still turn out scrumptious :-D

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Dance Around the World

To those of you who care (which is probably no one) I am sidetracking from my usual Student Teaching post..

Currently all of us Symphonic-discord authors are overwhelmed and stressed to the max with upcoming finals and presentations and papers and endless last minute assignments that professors like to torture us with. How we are going to survive the next two weeks, I have no idea.

Most of us get depressed. Some have anxiety attacks. And I want to say all of us even shed a tear or two (million).

It gets that crazy around finals and exam time.


One way I relieve stress is by watching the following video that my sister shared with me. It's a video called "Where the Hell is Matt?". It was put together by a couple of people. And it's about a guy named Matt who traveled to 42 countries in 14 months. And he takes (or someone else does, I think) a video of himself dancing in each place he's visited. It's so cute to watch. So yeah, just watch it..so you know what I'm talking about it.

(I hope everyone hasn't watched it already. Because I always end up being the last one to watch these youtube videos.)

So when I'm down in the dumps and freaking out about my final portfolio presentation or exams, I watch this.

(But it also makes me envious of Matt, because he's been to 42 freaking countries!!!)

(And I love the song too. It's called "Praan", or "Stream of Life". But I have no idea what they are saying. Even though, I think its in my native language: Bengali/Bangla)

It always, ALWAYS makes me smile though. :)

Anyways, hope it brings a smile to your face too.

Please keep us all in your prayers during these torturous two weeks.

Friday, December 5, 2008

Some people need a push..maybe I needed a shove.

I was sitting in the movie theatre when I get a bunch of phone calls. A shooting has occurred; bombs and grenades have been found. People urgently telling me to go home and stay there. Just go home. I was told it was a fight between 2 shopkeepers, I hear another one about it being terrorists, the third person tells me that they don't know what's going on. What is a fact though though is that the guy got away and is God knows where. My city is suspected to be the next target. I didn't know what to believe. We decided our lives are more important than a movie and even though we didn't think anything would happen we couldn't helping thinking what if? So we left. In the middle of the movie. Which happened to be quite funny, I might add..but it wasn't at the moment because after all those calls I kept thinking about what I would do if a bunch of people were to come in and shoot everyone and whether I'd feel the pain if a bomb exploded or not.

Really. I never thought I would have think twice before I went out to eat or shopping or a movie. I never thought I'd have to think about my safety.

I'm at those moments in my life where I'm like, "So this is what it feels like" for all the people out there who live in dangerous, war-stricken lands or even generally violent places. Except obviously their condition is a million times worse. I'm in no way comparing myself to their condition because I can't compare. It's ridiculous to try. I don't think I've ever felt fear until recently. And I don't think it's real fear. It's like almost-there-fear. But it's enough to scare me. The shootings I spoke of happened right in front of my college. The bombing in the mosque that occurred a year and a half ago happened less than a minute from the hospital I go to. Another set of bombings happened a while ago. I pass those places everyday on the way to or from school. So I think I have enough reason so be a teeny tiny bit scared

Muslims believe that there are four things written out for you on the 40th day in the womb: your sex, age at death, provisions, and whether you'll be blessed or not. So basically, I'm going to die whenever it was written for me to die. I don't know when or how but I know that that time is already set. The amount of time I'll be living has already been decided.

So no matter what I'll be doing at that moment, when it's time, it's time. And I'll be gone. So why live in fear? Why not enjoy the moment? I think that if we knew when we were to die most of us wouldn't spend them partying. I think we'd spend it worshipping God, asking for forgiveness and a place in paradise. Being nice to people, our parents, spending time with family. Doing things that count and give us those extra brownie points on the Day of Judgement.

But we don't know when we're going to go. And if, by chance, somehow we know for sure, it'll be too late. So we might as well make most of our time now. I'm not saying praying 24/7. Being a good Muslim/person doesn't mean worshipping all the time. It's about working for your family and loved ones, caring for people, being honest, etc. And with the right intention all of this gets counted into worship anyways. So it's really not a matter of WHEN we'll go..but are we ready to face our Lord?

The Prophet Muhammad, Peace and Blessings of God be upon him said, "The deeds most loved by God are the ones that are consistent, even if they are small." So consistently be honest. Consistently listen to your parents. Consistently pray the five daily prayers. Consistently help people. Consistently NOT constantly. Just form little habits. It's better than praying for 24 hours straight and then not doing anything the other 364 days of the year.

I hope this fear is God's way of reminding me that I should be trying a little harder, doing a little better. And I hope I can remember to listen and take heed of what I have just written and follow my own advice. Making God happy isn't hard. Being a good person isn't a tough job. Sometimes we get a little distracted or need a little push {or shove} once in a while.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

I love soup.

Especially potato soup, probably because I love potatoes so much. Anyways so it's cold, and i've been craving potato soup and clam chowder but i'm too lazy to try making clam chowder so i'm going to make warm, creamy potato soup! It's actually really easy to make so I thought I would share :).

1 medium onion, diced
4 cloves garlic
2 lbs. potatoes, diced
4 cups broth (chicken, turkey or vegetable)
1 cup milk or cream
Salt and pepper, to taste
Cheddar cheese for topping if desired

In a large stock pot over medium heat, saute onions and garlic in 2 tbsp. oil until soft. Add diced potatoes and broth and bring to a boil. Turn heat to low and simmer, partially covered, for 20 minutes or until potatoes are soft. Remove from heat and add milk or cream. Pour the soup into a blender to blend until you reach a consistency you want, I like it lumpy. Salt and pepper to taste and voila! You have very simple potato soup!

Monday, December 1, 2008

In Honor of World AIDS Day

Today is World AIDS Day, an epidemic most of us have forgotten, or take no heed to. So I thought why not shed some light on the subject? So here it is: At the end of 2007, 50% of all AIDS victims were women. And in Sub Saharan Africa, women accounted for 59% of AIDS victims. There are 11.6 million AIDS orphans in Africa. People under 25 account for half of all new HIV infections worldwide. The number of people living with HIV has risen from around 8 million in 1990 to 33 million today, and is still growing. Around 67% of people living with HIV are in sub-Saharan Africa.

Sunday, November 30, 2008

India's September 11

Mumbai, India

More than 170 people confirmed dead. 300 wounded.

For 60 hours there was shooting, explosions, and hostages held by several gunmen.

For India, it was September 11.

India's government officials want to name Pakistan, its neighboring country, as the perpetrator. But the country is refraining from saying this outright, worried about ruining the efforts made to bring the countries together, which would also end the 5-year cease fire.
Pakistan's government has completely denied its involvement in the attacks and even vowed to take action against any group that was involved.

The attacks were ruthless and undiscriminating. The internet has disquieting descriptions of the events and pictures of areas splattered with blood, shattered windows, chaotic scenes, and mourners of those who are dead.

People are angry. Why did it take an entire three hours to mount a rescue operation? How was it possible for only 10 men to take control of so many different locations for an entire three days?

I would also like to know exactly what the heck WAS going on while children, grandparents, parents, tourists, Hindus, Jews, Christians, Muslims and everyone else, who was going about their life expecting nothing more than the frustrating traffic of India, were being murdered left and right?

And I'm not just talking about the rescue operation. I'm also talking about the gunmen who I can only picture as soul-devoid, brain washed individuals, emotionless, creatures. Most of you have seen the eerie picture of the one gunman who seemed to have been smiling while shooting at something. It's the type of picture that haunts you at night.

What were they thinking? No way could they be enjoying that. Didn't they feel anything? Did they feel or think at all? Should I be pitying them? What if they were forced to do what they were doing? Am I a monster for assuming that they are monsters? But then again, what about ones who are the victims? I'm sometimes afraid to think about them. To think about the pain of the survivors and the relatives of the victims is despairing. To think about the lives lost, their thoughts and fears is painful and frightening.

Then there's my emotion of fear. I'm afraid of the backlash Muslims in India are going to face. Religious riots in India can be as bloody and as undiscriminating as this bloodshed. Not to mention they can be common. I'm afraid of the backlash Pakistan is going to face. Pakistan's government or any of its normal citizens would never condone any such acts. But that won't matter, not with India and Pakistan's history, Pakistan's some what unstable security, India's corruption and India's almost innate distaste for Pakistan. Then I'm afraid for the Muslims of the world. All those Muslims who are trying so hard to work against all the bloodshed and violence, which are now automatically linked with Islam. They now have another item that can be added to the list of reasons others fear them, refuse to associate with them, are disgusted with them, despise them.

You know you feel it too sometimes. Well guess what. We feel it too. We feel the pain as well when people are killed. Only for us its extra, we feel the pain for the lives lost, then we feel the pain of seeing our religion twisted and deformed. And then we feel the pain of other Muslims facing the consequences.But the rest of the world doesn't care. We're not foreign or inhumane like you may think. And we see your reactions, your looks. We know when you don't want to be around us because of our religion. We know when you make those dirty comments, and don't give a damn.

Like when I said Muslims were killed. You were like "Yeah right you just wanna say that because you're Muslim." But no it's true Muslims were victims too.But you won't believe me. India holds a HUGE Hindu majority but India also holds the second largest Muslim population in a country. Yes, the second largest. Muslims in India are the largest minority and these Muslims are proud to be Indian . I would know, since I'm also Indian.

And do people care that Muslim countries, and Muslims from all across the world have condemned the attacks? Yet the news would rather mention those couple of idiots that are fine, and encourage the mass murders. Then there are those who say that they have yet to see a popular condemnation from Muslims for these kind of attacks.

Well if you haven't seen it yet, here's one.

On behalf of EVERY Muslim in the world old, young, traditional, liberal, American, Indian, Saudi Arabian, Afghani, Pakistani, Chinese, Mexican and everyone here on the blog

I'm sorry.
I'm sorry for your loss.
I'm sorry for your pain. I'm sorry for your fears. I'm sorry you haven't heard me say sorry before.
I'm sorry I'm not there helping you.
Helping you heal, encouraging you, telling you it'll be okay.
Do I expect you to say you have nothing to be sorry about?
No I don't, but I'll still do it anyways.

We feel the sadness for a life lost too.
We would never be okay with those acts.

And we hate what happened to you. We hate what happened to them. We pray it gets better. And that it gets better soon.
Islam teaches compassion, we want you to know that.

And we pray you understand that we meant every word we said.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thank you SO freaking much!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

I have so many things to be thankful for. And as student teaching comes to an end (Thank God!), I'm reflecting. Not only on my student teaching experience, but also, my journey through these past four (and a half) years. I wouldn't be where I am today without my oh-so- wonderful professors and the entire College of Education staff. They have taught me everything I know and do. I owe them so much.

An ode to all my professors. (Ok, so it's really not an ode, but whatever). Without them, I would have probably made a superb teacher. Without them, I might have liked kids and teaching. Without them, I might have had hope in my future.

I would like to take this opportunity to thank them all for their "words of wisdom" and endless anecdotes. So here's to :

My professor, Miss C., from pre-student teaching, who compared me with a cheerleader. Seriously she did. I dont mind being compared to a cheerleader. In fact I wanted to be a cheerleader in high school. (Yes I did. I know it's not the most likely thing for a Muslim girl to do or be. But a girl can dream, cant she?) But her implications were no where near complimentary. In fact, she was down right insulting me. Not only did she do that, she even had the nerve to call me unprofessional. My professionalism is my pride and joy. The one thing I know I'm good at. And for her to make a negative comment about it, was like a punch to the stomach.

Miss. C.: *referring to my outfit for that day* One thing you need to work on is your attire.
Me: Excuse me?
Miss. C.: You're not going to a cheerleading match. You're teaching children.
Me: Uhhhhh...huh...ummm...but...I'm wearing a sweater. I don't really understand what you're trying to say.
Miss. C.: You're shirt should have been tucked in.
You look like a cheerleader. And that, Ms. Attitude, is not professional at all.

WHAT THE?!?!?!

And I kid you not, this is what I was wearing. And I'm sorry , but the last time I checked, cheerleaders don't wear sweaters and collared shirts with slacks and heels.

The same professor, Miss. C, who insisted upon the fact that I celebrated Christmas and Easter.

Miss C.: So what do you do for Christmas?
Me: Oh, well... I don't celebrate Christmas.
Miss. C.: Ok I understand that. But what do you do for Christmas?
Me: Ummm... I dont do anything... because.. well like I just said I dont celebrate it.
Another pre-student teacher: Constructive Attitude is Muslim.Muslims don't celebrate ---.
Miss C. cutting her off: Everyone celebrates Christmas. So what do
you do?

Uhhh, actually everyone doesn't celebrate Christmas, lady. Everyone gets the day off for Christmas. That's hardly the same thing.

Same thing happened for Easter. And by that point, I think I just made something up about my Easter celebration. Just so I wouldnt have to go through her interrogation again. I seriously think she has some loose screws up there.

Miss. C, once again, taking all the pre-student teachers "out to eat" to celebrate the end of our pre-student teaching. Only to have us pay for our own meals. And then giving us each a pre-student teaching- professor evaluation form. (In our university, as I'm sure is the case with all universities, professors are not allowed to be in the same vicinity in which students are evaluating them. And also a student has to take in the evaluations on behalf of the class. This ensures that the professors don't tamper with their own evaluations. Duh! ) She stayed with us the entire time. Watched us evaluate her. And then took the evaluations from us. My friend and I told her we would take it in. We even left the restaurants with the freaking evaluations, before she noticed. Got into my friends car. And pulled out. Lo and behold, Miss. C. is right behind us, chasing after us, screaming that she needed the evaluations. I kid you not.She literally chased. after. the.freaking.car.--by. foot. This is the same lady that was parked in a handicapped spot. Running after us. Taking the evaluations from her must have cured her handicap.

And here's to the professor that blatanly stated that all female teachers must wear high heels, pearls and skirts/dresses at all times when teaching young children. Because we're living in the 19th century, right? Right.

Here's to that same professor telling everyone in the class that I was Indian, when I clearly told her that I wasnt. I dont know what's with these professors thinking that they know who I am and trying to force their opinions and beliefs on me.

Here's to my education advisor who only gave me fifteen minutes of his time only to tell me what I already knew. It was much appreciated that he would take time out of his oh-so-busy schedule to fit me in and give me such useful advice.

Here's to the College of Education staff for being so non-welcoming and answering none of my questions.

To the director of student teaching placement, thank you for not taking my suggestions and requests into consideration when placing me for student teaching. And also making me commute to a school that is twenty minutes away from me. And a special thanks for not placing me at a school that is five minutes away from me.

And thank you for placing me a month late and making me miss very important days of the school year.

To the College of Education, thank you for all the scholarships that you did not award me.

Also to the College of Education, thank you for requiring us to buy a Macbook .Thank you for changing your mind about it a million and one times. And thank you for forcing some of us, broke college students, to buy a $2500 laptop that we did not even need.

Basically thank you for being indecisive.

Here's to my college supervisor, the one that evaluates my teaching performance. The one that told me that there is no way in hell I will get a job after I graduate. I might as well look for a substituting position. Yeah let me become a substitute when I very well have a teaching certificate. A certificate that I busted my butt for. That makes sense.

And a special thanks to all the professors that treated us like five year olds. And made us do projects that kids would do. Instead of letting us come up with our own ideas, we were stuck doing yours. Fun!

And to that one professor that told a classmate of mine that she should re-think her career options as a teacher, because she was way too emotional. Those were very comforting words for us all to hear. Especially us emotional ones.

And last, but not least, lets not forget to thank the professor who told the entire class that he, himself, hates teaching.

And you wonder where such wonderful teachers come from. (Such as myself!)

Well now you know.

And you know who to thank too.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Summary of the past week

1. Texting my friend in chemistry class who was a couple of seats ahead of me. I went into this spleech about some self-realization I had about my self (Am I being redundant? Stupid University English course didn't teach me anything)
And her reply text?
What? You don't make any sense. Pay attention
My annoyed response: Shutup Baka!
(For of you who don't know, this is a Japanese term I discovered that I love using as an insult)
Her response: Boogalah!
(Apparently she thought I had gone crazy and was trying to scare me into being quiet)

2. Driving to babysitting and seeing in big print on the back of a SUV:

Drive closer wondering if the world went crazy.


Free Demo DOG Training

Sorry, we don't train Husbands, Wifes or Kids

Apparently it did go crazy and became witty at the same time. And it isn't it supposed to be wives?? (At least elementary school english class taught me something).

3. Four year old girl I was babysitting is looking at me and makes a weird face.

"I don't like your glasses. Take them off. Don't come with your glasses next time"

This is what I get for wearing contacts to all of our former encounters and assuming that kids don't care about looks...

4. Same four year old kid staring at my face. (Hold your breath..hold it...I'm sure she won't say anything)

"You have a spot on your chin. Why do you have spots? "

What the heck? WHICH spot is she talking about? The acne? The acne scars? The beauty mark? The other hundreds of reasons that made 'spots' on my face that she could see? It can't be the pores? They're not that big......Right???

"I dunno. You have a spot too. Right here. Why do you have that spot?"
(I pointed at a beauty mark on her cheek).
"Hee Hee I dunno"

That's great kid. You have a beauty mark and I had to use that one thing as ammunition.

5. SAME four year old kid for once not pointing at my arm and asking me why I have hair on my arms. Yes, it has been happening at every encounter thus far, and the one time that it didn't happen is worth celebrating.

Seriously, the way your self-esteem can degrade around little kids is amazing.

6. Discovering that some french actor named Gaspard Ulliel is the best looking guy I have ever seen...I think. At least in his younger looking pictures. Doesn't help that my self-esteem was just shot down by 100 points (just like the stock market !) the same week I discovered him.

Not that it made it made feel worse either, just didn't help. Get it?...

7. Getting over how Gaspard Ulliel might be the best looking guy I've ever seen, after a couple of hours. (What can I say, I recover fast-It was just like the Twilight effect.)

8. All weekend long- my cat meowing at me constantly while I was trying to study and then running away when I approached her or acted like I'm getting up. Apparently this was the best game she's ever played. If I close the door, a paw is sticking out from underneath accompanied by more meowing.

9. Wasting my time for the most of the weekend trying to start studying (Note: Youtube is not a good source to gain inspiration to start studying). Start cramming early Sunday afternoon (Hey at least it was early afternoon), up until two minutes before exam on Monday. Take exam. Cry on how I don't know anything, and how stupid I am, and why I can't get an A, and how difficult the exam was.

10. Wondering why I'm sitting and writing this post, when I CLEARLY should be working on the SIX homework assignments that are due for my Genetics class tomorrow morning...Mehh I'll try and do it first thing tomorrow morning.
(Note: I wrote this post two days ago. And no, I didn't end up doing it in the morning, or anytime in the morning for that matter)

12. Actually watched Twilight and DIDN'T need my handy-dandy rolling pin, spatula and grease combo (click here). The movie itself did a pretty good job at keeping its fans at bay. Like REALLY REALLY really far away from the bay. Snorted, laughed and tried killing myself oh.. 295 times. Tried replacing the guy playing edward with Gaspard Ulliel, realized I couldn't remember what Mr. Ulliel's face looked like. Only recommend spending the stupid $10 (yes TEN, stupid holdiay prices. If it's not gas prices, it's movie tickets.) if you're in the mood for a comedy movie that has only one good scene.

11. Mused over the awesomeness of this poem and its ability to describe my life:

Who makes these changes?
I shoot an arrow right. It lands left.
I ride after a deer and find myself chased by a hog.
I plot to get what I want and end up in prison.
I dig pits to trap others and fall in.
I should be suspicious
of what I want. -Rumi

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

"An Extravagance is something that your spirit thinks is a necessity" ~ Bern Williams

I just bought a beautiful dress.

It has ah-maaazing color amazing work on it. I went to a few stores after I saw it because it was a little expensive and I thought I'd look around. It was those loved-it-so-much-I-gasped-when-I-saw-it type of dresses so nothing at the other stores looks good. And now I feel really bad.

It doesn't help that as we went to pay my sister gave me a little smirk and said, "Do you feel nauseaus yet?"

So now I dedicate this post to making me feel less guilty.
Reasons why it's OKAY I splurged and that it was worth the price:

1. I needed it.
2. It was gorgeous.
3. I've been looking for this color forever and finally found it AND it's pretty.
4. My sister buys clothes that are a lot more expensive than mine for COLLEGE so I think I can get a little pricier dress for a wedding. She even gets more expensive dresses than I do. {she will kill me if she reads this}
5. I never use my allowance on myself {yes, I still get one lol}. My mom gave me a budget and the dress wasn't in it. So I paid for the difference out of my pocket..which would have otherwise gone on food. Really..who needs food?

These reasons aren't really valid. haha. So I just talked to my mom and she was laughing at me. So now I feel a little better. Because if my mother is okay with it then I should, too. If she wasn't she'd be like, "Falling Uppp!!!! Oh Em Gee WHY would you do that!?}

Let's tie Islam into this shall we? Islam is about moderation. Everything should be in moderation, except maybe worship. I don't think there's such thing as too much worship unless you start ignoring your family and job and stuff.

According to Purification of the Heart, Wantonness is the desire for always wanting more. If you have less than someone you should be happy for your blessings and grateful that you are not in a worse situation. And if you have more than most people you should be very grateful for what you have. There's a saying that goes something like in terms of worldy things you should compare yourself to the one who has less than you and be grateful of your situation. And for religion and spirituality you should compare yourself to the one who is better off than you so that you shall strive to be like them.

How to cure this? According to this book by feeling voluntary hunger and remembering death. By fasting or going hungry you can remind yourself how lucky you are to know when and where your next meal will be. If you are among the lucky ones, your meal will be clean and cooked properly. Maybe even hot. Hunger can also remind you of how some people can't even afford the basic necessities to live {food, clothing, shelter} let alone a cell phone, laptop, shoes, cars, etc. There are people out there starving to death and here are people trying to LOSE WEIGHT because they have too much food.

By remembering death you can get reminded that once you die people cry for you for a day or two and then life moves on. The pretty things you bought don't matter anymore. That stuff doesn't go in your grave with you. And even if it did, would it matter? You're gone. The only thing that can help you is how good you lead your life. Your deeds. Your actions. Your intentions. How you treated you parents. How you were honest. This will all help. Good character is what you need then.

So comparing the beginning or my post and the end, I sound like a hypocrite, right? I don't think so. First of all, they don't take returns in India so fat chance of me getting my money back. {el oh el} Second of all I'm human and make mistakes. I made a mistake, I feel guilty and I'll try to not do it again. The end. God isn't mean. :)

And it doesn't mean that I can't have nice things. God likes to see the blessings of his servants on them. If you're rich and can afford better clothes, then buy them. But don't be so extravagant and go out of your means or to the point of showing off with it. Extravagance also depends on how much money you have. And one must also be careful with being too miserly as well {another disease of the heart}. Balance is the key.

Some related quotes from the Quran:

"Obey God and His Messenger, and dispute not among yourselves lest you falter and your strength departs from you. And be patient, for God is with the patient. And do not be like those who leave their homes filled with excessive pride about your state, showing off before people and preventing others from the way of God. And God encompasses what they do." {Quran 8:46-47}

"God does not love those who exult" {Quran 28:76}

Monday, November 24, 2008

Med School Diaries: Exam Time

I'm done with my last exam..for another three weeks, that is.
And my head hurts. Not from all that studying and writing and lack of sleep.
But because of sitting in an exam hall trying to make up enough BS to get me through three hours. As my friend put is, "You write your own movie."

Studying in India is NOT an easy job. Med school regardless of where you life isn't an easy job. I think it's worse in India. The exam format isn't multiple choice where you can logically guess the answer or choose by the process of elimination. It's an all.essay.format. For most of the subjects, you either know it or you don't. And for the ones you can slightly BS, you can't BS a whole paper. You have to know the general idea. Feel sorry for me yet? I hope you do, because I like sympathy and hugs. :)

Oh, and I'm a big cry baby. I cry before every final exam. I cried the whole 40 minute drive to school on the phone with my dad for every exam in second year. And I will cry again this year. I have a huge fear of failure.

The exams are timed, of course. And if you keep writing after time they come around and snatch the papers out of your hand. How sad is that? I almost cry when they do that. I don't like mean people.

During the final exams you have to present what they call a "hall ticket". Basically it's a piece of paper with your info {along with identification marks! I have a mole on my left cheek and a bigger mole on my left leg..I think I'm pretty identifiable} and picture on it, telling you which exams you signed up for and are allowed to write.

After our finals exams we have a practical exam which is the Lab Exam or whatever. In first and second year you had to do labs. Third and Fourth year we have to examine patients!! And we have an oral exam which I am horrible at doing because I am a bad public speaker and yes, one person does count as public.

I don't know the point to this or why I chose to write about something so boring. But I guess because I just finished and wanted to update.

I'm pretty sure I failed. But right now I don't care {maybe part of the reason is because I highly doubt they are counting this exam}. I'm tired, I'm homesick, but most of all, I'm happy I'm done. And that's all that matters. Happiness.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

And now the news..

I know i've been shirking on my duties lately :) sorry CC! But this is to make up for it.

So issue number one..Clinton as Secretary of State?? Well I guess he's making good on the promise not to surround himself with people who just agree with him.

So apparently 8 Jewish teenagers have been jailed in Israel for carrying out Neo-Nazi attacks on Jews, drug addicts and gays. They were immigrants from the former Soviet Union, ages between 16-19.

Pope Benedict XVI called into question the usefulness of interfaith dialogue on Sunday saying that we should focus more on the practical consequences of religious differences..(okaaaay)

Israel's blockade has Gaza's biggest hospital reeling under power shortages due to the fuel cuts.

The Taliban has said that they will up their attacks on NATO and US convoys to show their "might".

A US congressional panel has warned that China has developed such a sophisticated and active cyber warfare program that the US "may be unable to counteract or even detect" an attack.

I guess thats all i've been looking at right now,

I love poetry.

There are a couple of things that can make me swoon and sigh, white chocolate coconut that melts in your mouth is one of them :). But another is Rumi. His poems just uplift me in a way that I cannot describe. Any time my spirits fall, all I have to do is open up one of his books of poetry and I get lost in his descriptions of God and spirit and love, which are all one thing to him. I haven't been reading his poetry since the summer. Things have just piled up one after another, but my birthday's coming up and I wanted to just take a minute and reflect on the year that has passed. Have I grown? Stayed the same? Shrunk? I believe i've grown and changed. Anyways, this poem is called The Freshness and it makes me swoon :):

When it's cold and raining,
you are more beautiful.

And the snow brings me
even closer to your lips.

The inner secret, that which was never born,
you are that freshness, and I am with you now.

I can't explain the goings,
or the comings. You enter suddenly,

and I am nowhere again.
Inside the majesty.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Twilight (Eeeek!)


...Ok you can stop squealing.

I'm wondering if I'm digging my own grave by writing about Twilight. Any of you who are even slightly knowledgeable about this blog, know that there is at least one Edward Cullen fanatic (his self-proclaimed wife) present as an author on this blog.

(Note, I said at least, both Mrs. Cullen and S.M. will try to shove me into the grave)

Honestly, this whole Twilight/'I'll die for Eddy..sigh' hype is way too overplayed. Heck, I've read the books too. I'll even admit it. After reading the first one, even I was charmed in by the thing called Edward. But a little more than a week later, the effects wore off, and gratefully I came to my senses. But I still read the next one, and I think maybe even the 3rd ( I was hoping the story would take off at some point)

Then, I stopped. I couldn't take it anymore !!!
They're IDIOTS( I mean the main characters). And the author needs to improve her writing. And oh yeah, all the other problems going on in the world, such as the war, the economy, disease, people dying, none of that even TOUCHES the main characters. Nor that it should because their world has only each other.

For all of you living in your nice, comfy caves- Should I explain the story to you?

There's this girl Bella, she starts out normal and fine, just a regular teenage girl who has a little more common sense and a better sense of responsibility than the average teenage girl. She moves to a new town (of course she moves to a new, never been heard of, small town)

There she meets this really pale guy, Edward (and of course this guy is mysterious at this never been heard off before, small town)

He turns out to be a vampire. (WELL DUH...it's a never been heard of before, small town! Where else would he be?)And he has these superhuman powers and could easily kill her and everyone (The Lion and the lamb...just like the poster says? Get it?)

And they fall in love. I mean yeah ok, it wasn't that simple. There's this whole, he's a vampire but he doesn't drink the blood of humans, but he can't control himself around her thing. Oh yeah, and she's not scared of him and doesn't care. But he loves her too much and doesn't want him around her because she might get hurt (every idiot squeals) and then he decides he can handle it because he can't stand not being around her (everyone squeals again).

Oh and did I mention that about 99% of their thoughts and life revolve around the other. It was after the effects of the book wore off that I realized, that the two main character HAD NO PERSONALITIES!!

It was basically "Oh Bella", "Oh Edward", "Bella", "Edward", "Bella, you should be scared of me", "Edward, I'm not afraid", "Bella", "Edward, "Oh yeah, everybody and everything else", "Bella", "Edward","Oh Bella", "Oh Edward" "I love you", "I can't live without you"...etc Do you feel like puking yet??

Do you understand what I mean by no personalities? I even asked a friend yesterday to describe his personality... and this is what I got:

Loyal (The word Bella-obsessive would be more accurate, but whatever)


And that's it. That's all she could think of (she came up with boring and stupid after two whole minutes). Yes I'm sure you're throwing all these words at me, "HEY you jerk! He's charming, and romantic, and nice,and handsome, and so courageous, and so gorgeous, and loving..."

But seriously, two of those don't even count as being part of his personality. And the others go under Bella-obsessive, and nice? (EVERYONE'S NICE-or can be-it's not much)

So there you go. Basically when the movie came to theaters this past weekend every teeny-bopper girl and the rest, had to go to drool over this guy------>

And I read on someone's blog, (who also went to see the movie) that little girls were there dressed as brides.


Brides of...well it has to be this guy--->

But seriously...what?

Did they take a look at THIS GUY---------------------------->

My friends had it all planned to go to watch this movie together. But it didn't work out and so they're gonna try it again next week. I think I'll go along, and take a rolling pin, a spatula and some grease with me.

That way I can whack any one of them who get any marriage ideas. And scrape off any of them who attach themselves to the screen.

On a side note, it seems a lot of you disagree with the person playing Edward Cullen. Some of you have even admitted that the guy you want doesn't exist. But still I want to know. Who do you think should play Edward?

Here are some of the answers I've gotten, that according to people would be the closest thing.

Gaspard Ulliel

Prison Break guy

Tom Sturridge

Smallville guy

The guy