Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts

Friday, November 30, 2012

The Housewife Life - episode 1 "Dryer Woes"

I've picked a few fights with my laundry dryer in the past few months. I end up feeding it the wrong things. And I'm not a ditz that I don't know how to work a dryer. One occurred out of 100% pure laziness and the other was unintentional. Either way, the dryer decided to fight back.

My husband has a habit of not emptying his pockets. Ever. So anytime I have to put his pants or jeans in the washing machine I stand over the garbage can throwing away handfuls of tissues and receipts or putting dollar bills and coins on the night stand.

I do this pretty religiously, because I don't like the rest of the laundry to go bad or an important receipt to get destroyed. One time I was so unfortunate to miss an inky pen. A pen! Who misses a pen? I do. I've found a pen or two in the past. But usually no damage has been done. But this time there was ink all over the dryer. Surprisingly and thankfully, none of the clothes got stained, despite it being a load of whites.

Since the clothes were not affected, I didn't learn my lesson. Of course not.

Another item that frequently gets missed is a stick of chewing gum. Normally nothing happens, except the gum comes out really soft. My husband sometimes eats only half. I noticed a lot of people do this and my question is why? It's so little it's hard to chew it, let alone find it in your mouth. I tried it once and I kept thinking that I'd miss the gum and bite down on my cheek or tongue instead.

This time I knew there was gum in his pants. I could smell the stick of Juicy Fruit all the way across the room. I was lazy and in a hurry to get the laundry done. Thinking that it's no big deal I tossed it into the washing machine. Then the dryer. As I was removing the clothes I noticed white junk all over the dark shirts and pants. This can't be good. I also noticed the strong smell of Juicy Fruit all over the clothes. I looked inside the walls of the dryer and there was sticky gum all over it, all over the clothes. I guess it was half a stick of gum, so it would be easier for the gum to escape onto everything. It didn't look pretty there with all the black ink from the previous incident.

At least the clothes smelled fruity.

I had to scrub the gum off with a metal sponge and goo gone, which worked like a charm. If you haven't heard of it, buy it! It's amazing and a life saver. Only I was scared the goo gone would catch flame the next time I tried to dry something because of the warning label, which is on everything, really, on the back. So I had to wipe it down really good to make sure it would be ok. And that it wouldn't ruin the next load going in.

Did I learn my lesson? Probably not.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Mid-week Pick me up

I am very intrigued by finger art. Some of these people got super creative! I'll let the photos speak for themselves. :) {edit} Scrolling through them, I realized a lot are kind of gory or gross. But they were more creative then the lovey dovey ones. Haha. {/edit}













Thursday, December 29, 2011

To eat or not to eat?

My father-in-law went to the hospital a few days ago. He had just returned from a weeklong stay, 4-5 days prior. He was treated for anemia, possible pneumonia, and coronary heart disease. He came home yesterday after treatment for hyperklemia (high potassium), chronic kidney failure, anemia, gastritis, and other conditions.

He has diabetes, high blood pressure, hypertension, a pacemaker (he had several heart attacks). He takes nearly a dozen medications.

He's 80.

Usually when he gets home from his twice-a-year hospital stays, the family begin their lectures: don't eat unhealthy foods, drink more water, walk more. Sit up. Don't always sleep.

His diet is "kept under control" for 2-3 weeks after he returns from the hospital.
Then the complaining begins. He'll say he can't stand the food. No one cares about his feelings. He says, he is dying. He gives my mother-in-law a full-blast guilt trip. While my sister-in-law and I encourage her to ignore his bad food requests, he gives her the "You don't care about me, don't you?" speech.

In our culture it is understood if an old person wants to eat the way they want, their wishes are to be respected for they may not have long to live. In theory it is a beautiful treatment of our elders, while in reality it is a speedy way to get to death.

While the family repeatedly tell him to keep his health in check, it all goes away after a few weeks. They have their own health issues to worry about.

My mother-in-law gives us her own guilt trip. "You will understand someday..." she says, speaking of restrictions we may face in food eventually.

My brother-in-law is probably the only one who actively tries to keep his health in check in this home. It's hard in a house where food is loved and prepared with care. The tastier the food is, the happier spirits are. While some enjoy the food spicy, others cannot tolerate it. While some eat this, others rather eat that. It can be tough living with many people.

I have my own spicy-limit food tolerance. But I ignore it most of the time until my body shuts down. Having to prepare separate meals makes me anxious. Nervous.

Maybe my mother-in-law sees it the same for my father-in-law. Maybe it makes her uncomfortable to serve him "less tasty" food than the rest of the family." It almost seems as if he is being restricted from food altogether.

When we are allowed to eat something "better than him" we are reminded to keep it hush-hush.

Meanwhile the family will make their routine visits. Health tips will keep pouring in. People will go on with their lives. And so will he until his body cannot take it anymore. Once again. (God knows best).

May God give us the wisdom strength and perserverance to carry on.

Friday, November 18, 2011

A real friend will laugh at/with you, when you tell them about the student who said that they wanted to kill you...

It's November. School has been in session for 51 days (always seems like much more then it really is). And I havent given you all one update from this school year. My apologies for that.

My new class annoys me. Or did in the beginning of the year. I'm getting used to them though, and missing my former students less and less. They've moved on. Forgotten my name. And have given all their love over to their second grade teacher. Whatevs to them. I dont care.

This year's class was proving to be dull and I didnt have much to share, hence the lack of sharing.

Until this week.

Sure I had some stories. Like this one time when I was blending the word "ditch" with my students and asked them to write it down. And was walking around and noticed that majority of them write their "d" as a "b". I kept wondering why the heck my students were writing b****.


And then the time when I asked a student to use the word "tail and tale" in a sentence and he said "My momma said she gon whoop my tail/tale".

But those are eh.

Anywho,I have a student in my class, who I knew from last year (he was retained). He is a very sweet young man, but when he gets upset, theres chaos. He was put on red for punching his sister (shes also in my class) because she wouldnt let him be first in line (Being first in line is sooooooooooooo important to them). He was upset cause he was on red, so he started throwing a tantrum.And I asked him to leave my room, wash his face, look at how silly he looks, stop crying, drink some water, and come back into the classroom when he's ready.

He was willing to do all of that. But from last year's experience, I knew not to send him anywhere on his own because there was a possiblity he would run away, out the door, and down the street. So I sent one of my reliable student's with him.

And when they came back, the reliable student said "He wants to kill you. He told me so in the bathroom."

"What did he say?"

"Uhh...I want to kill her."

He ended up getting suspended for making a comment like this. For one day. And that was that.


I got home and I told my husband.

He told me to quit.

I told some of my friends.

They were worried and concerned.

I told my mom.

She freaked out. Was worried and concerned. And told me to quit.

And then I told C.C.

And she laughed.

And I laughed right with her, cause it was meant to be a funny story to tell.*

Right? Hahaha?

The end.


*Disclaimer: I understand that sometimes we should be cautious of these things and take them very seriously, what with some kids really coming to school with guns and knives ready to kill somebody. But I know this kid. And as soon as he said it, he regretted it and showed remorse, and apologized. And he received a consequence for it. And everything was okay. Alhamdulilah I am alive.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Mid-Week Pick me up

Last week a group of people and I were talking about how Muslims are portrayed in the Media humorously and what is and isn't tasteful. Someone brought up The Simpsons episode "Mypods and Boomsticks." It's about a Jordanian boy named Bashir, whose family recently moved to Springfield. Homer's friends convince Homer that the Bashir's family is a terrorist and he sets out to investigate.









I just watched it and thought it was pretty funny and wanted to share it in case you haven't seen it. It's worth a watch. Let me know what you think. :) click HERE to check it out.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Half Married

I was married to a man who lives about 3 minutes from my parent's house. While I was thrilled to live nearby, I knew sometimes I'd want my distance.

Living close-by means getting to see my family at least once a week without any hassle. We attend the same mosque, generally know the same people, and all our family who live in Michigan live within a 5-10 minute drive.

That also means I cannot stay overnight as often, make shorter visits since I can "go over at anytime I want" theoretically. It's hard to plan things with just my husband and I. We'll get phone calls to go over and visit the parents.

The 3-minute distance is just enough distance to always need a ride (since I don't have my own car), have surprise visits, have to pick up phone calls at odd times to comfort tensions in the house, and get stuck in the middle of my old life as the "mediator."

Sometimes I feel half married. I still play an active role in my former home. I wonder what it'd be like to get away from both sides and start focusing more on myself and my future family.

I think I'll end up lonely (lol).

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Today, give a stranger one of your smiles. It might be the only sunshine he sees all day. {from P.S. I Love You}

I was just thinking about how a little kindness can go a LONG way.

It is now my goal in life to smile when I make eye intact with someone. Or do something nice for a stranger if the opportunity arises. You never know how far that little gesture can go and turn a persons horrible day upside down.

It also might make people more aware of the fact that a little random act of kindness can go a long way. Maybe they'll pay if forward.  And maybe it'll spread and maybe eventually people won't hate on each other for no reason and the world will be good again. Was it ever good?

Anyways, because the world is ugly and selfish, I decided to try and do random good things. And to count my blessings and the beauty around me. If I post it here maybe it'll make me more aware of the good stuff in my life and stop my complaining.

Today's good things:

1. Grape leaves. Someone made them. I don't know who. People either hate them or love them. I love.


2. Tests. They make me smarter.


3. I don't like surprises when I know one's coming, but they're fun.


4. Annnnd this. WTHeck??


Tuesday, March 29, 2011

El oh el!

Laughing is refreshing. It's fun to do. It's a helluva lot better than sulking.

Occasionally me and Chuckle have laughing fests. I'll laugh about something, she'll laugh at my distinctive laugh. And next thing you know, we have tears streaming down our face and we're holding the sides of our stomachs from pain.

We also used to lie down next to each other, in an upside down position, and talk to one another. The way your mouth looks in this position, while you talk, used to crack us up! It just looked so dumb and funny to see your mouth move from an upside down angle.





So after watching the recent CNN special on "Unwelcome: The Muslims Next Door", I was in a state of panic and worry and disgust and anger and just an overall upset mood. If you haven't watched it or didn't hear about it, it's basically about the city of Mursfreesboro, Tennessee, enraged that the Muslim residents of the city decided on relocating and constructing their mosque to a larger space. There were many people for and OBVIOUSLY against the building of the mosque and many protests over it. So much controversy surrounded it that it was taken to court. Just a lot of tension, bigotry, and ignorance in the city of Mursfreesboro. It was very disheartening to watch and take in.

However I got an email today from one of our former authors, Artistic Logic, that has kept me laughing all day. Instead of getting upset and outraged, Artistic Logic, more or less, pointed out the ridiculous things people say, ludicrous things people do, and even the outrageous things people wear. Not to mention the lack of knowledge people have about a lot of things these days, particularly that of Islam and Muslims. Don't get me wrong, the special presented by CNN is a very serious issue and impacts many people, myself included. And I applaud CNN for taking the initiative and raising awareness about this. But after some time, if you really look back on it, and listen to some of the stuff and watch the actions of people, it really makes you guffaw at it all.

While talking about subject and predicate parts of a sentence with my class, I randomly thought of it, and I suppressed a giggle. And then again when I was yelling at my students for shouting out during instruction, I had to force the smile away that was creeping up on my lips. And while driving home from work, I was grinning from ear to ear, while thinking about it.

I dont know about you, but I just love to laugh. I feel like my whole day was much nicer cause of that email that had me hooting since dawn.

Not to mention that LOL-ing is much more fun and better,then say, FML-ing.

Friday, March 18, 2011

In Pursuit of my Cousin

A few years ago my cousin, her cousin, my sister and I went to watch In Pursuit of Happyness.Wow that was a long time ago. Feels like yesterday. We had about an hour to kill before the movie started so we decided to get some ice cream. As we were stuffing out faces HE walked in. He was around my height {Indians in India are short}, wearing a red baseball cap covering half his face, a big blingy earring in his left ear, baby blue sweatshirt, baggy dark wash jeans, sneakers and, of course, a huge silver chain. I never thought I could so accurately remember his description, but I never thought I'd have acid thrown in my face until that moment, either.

Okay, we didn't have acid thrown in our faces but didn't you catch that episode of Oprah way back when??

We finished up our ice cream and still had about half an hour so we decided to explore the stores. As we were about to enter a clothing store we hear a guy calling out behind us, "Excuse me? Excuse me??" Normally I just ignore because it's never for me. But this guy was persistent. We finally turned around and {not to me, of course} to my cousin says, "Excuse me.....I think I'm in love with you."

Hmmthat'sniceyaykthanksbye. None of us said anything. We just walked into the store.

It's like this. In America, if a guy opens the door for you, you smile and say thank you. In India, if a guy opens a door for you, you shoot him a glare that implies that you're ready to slap him around with the bottom of your shoe. Things are different here and even simple eye contact usually ends up in one of the parties getting too excited...and the other being stalked.

As we were browsing along, minding our own business, I noticed the same guy standing outside. Waiting anxiously. Anyways, it's almost movie time so we're like whatever, just ignore him and he'll take the hint and leave. But he calls out to my cousin again while following us around the mall. And we ignore him again, this time ducking into another store. The shoe store has all glass walls and the guy is staring at us through the glass and following us around the store from the outside. It was REALLY CREEPY, guys. Following us from glass wall to glass wall. I don't think he came in because they'd call security or something for harrassing potential customers.

I don't know why it didn't occur to us to call security right then and there.

Movie time, thank God. The theaters are on another floor and you're not allowed up without a ticket. He didn't have a ticket. It was funny watching him from above on the escalator. He just stood there like a little sad puppy, watching us.

During intermission we go out for popcorn and other movie things. and *gasp* There he is. Watching. Waiting. He either bought a ticket or did something {read: bribed someone} to get up there. My cousin wasn't with us, so he came running up to us, pleading to speak to my cousin.

Again. Ignore.

You guys might think telling him off or simply nicely saying no, she's not interested would be enough. But this is the third world, India Edition, and like I said, being nice gets you in trouble. Eye contact gets you in trouble. Breathing at the wrong time will get you into trouble.

So the movie ends and this guy has been waiting for about two hours or so outside the theater. Again, he follows us around and we go to the parking lot. He stopped following us and we breathe a sigh of relief. I mean, what if he followed us home or something? Or what if he punctured our tires or did something in the dark empty parking lot?? WHO KNOWS HOW THIS GUY WOULD TURN OUT.

It's always the little ones. They're like evil little elves or something.

I'm little. Does that make me evil? *shiftty eyes*

So we're driving out of the parking lot and we all start screaming in horror because outside the exit there he was, waiting on his motorcycle. I figured he's stalked many women in his time or he had thought of everything possible in case he found "the one" for him.

At this point we really start to freak out thinking he'll follow us home and burn the house down or something. Oh, and I had images of acid being splashed on my face, of course. My cousin's cousin then tells the security guard to hold the guy for about five minutes. And that she'll report him if he doesn't stop him from following us. Oh Em Gee. The whole ride home we were freaking out whenever we saw a guy with a red cap on. But Alhamdulillah, we were able to get away from him.

If you've made it this far, you're probably thinking how dumb it was to freak out like that or anything. I would, too, but after living here I've learned that things are handled much differently here. And I treat guys differently here than I do in when I'm in America. I'm still laughing about how he strategically parked his bike right outside the exit so he could easily follow us out.

Monday, February 7, 2011

My cat kept coming after my cereal bowl, so I pushed her away using my head...literally

It was snowing really bad the other day. And my family was gone out all day, and like hell I was going to go out and shovel and give up on my newly started record of sitting on the spot that I was planted into for more than 24 hours, happily stressing about school.
Instead I did the next best thing, I sent out frantic text messages to all of them, telling them to come home asap!
And the most magical part was that I never had to move.

They came home eventually, and of course one of the cars is gonna get stuck in the snow. And they tried getting it out for Godknowshowlong. Eventually my brother C and my mom come inside and I find out about the battle going on outside.
Clueless me.

I tell C about my miraculous like ability to get out cars that are stuck. And he says, "Of course its miraculous if you can manage to do it".

(He didn't actually say that, but if he was witty like me, he would have totally thought that)

So upon my mom and C's hailing of me, (is that like idiotic english?) I unselfishly lifted myself out of the computer chair, sadly turned back to look at the chair that wasn't sat in long enough to be imprinted, and marched over..... to the bathroom.

I had to pee.

Anyways, eventually I pulled on a second layer of pants, kept my super funky and bulky prayer scarf on , and pulled on my oldest jacket with my long, completely mismatching kurta sticking out from underneath, and went out to help my family get the car unstuck from the snow. It's not like there's anyone out there other than my family.

I step outside, see our neighbor's car and at least one of my brother's friend out there helping out my dad and my brothers, and turned back around and walked straight back inside.

THE END

Not really, I ran into C who yells out "who cares!", and I say, "You're right! Who cares!"
And I go back out determined to show my ability to take out the car. I get into the driver's seat, turn the wheel completely, and yes, miraculously pulled the car out in ONE go.

Then I yelled out to C, "I TOLD YOU!"

Brother B remarks, "It could have helped that there were at least 5 guys pushing from the front," He always got stuck with the minor details.

CC, out

P.S. If you're curious about what a kurta is, look it up! It's a south asian clothing.
P.P.S. My title has nothing to do with my post. So don't focus on it. You will get confused

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Geico: So easy that a caveman can do it.

It's like 5 am.

Ok. No. I lied. It's really 7:28 am.

But who can tell the difference? I'm awake when I don't want to be, everyone else is sleeping and it's still dark outside. And it's a saturday. So it's pretty much the same.

I should be studying.

No. I lied again. I REALLY REALLY should be studying.

I didn't do anything all day yesterday (=got no school work done) because I couldn't stop feeling anxious and restless and all I wanted to do is eat, which I did; first breakfast, second breakfast, pizza, hash browns, dinner, second mini dinner including two toaster strudels, then two bowls of popcorn and chips (mixed together ) right before I gave up and went to sleep.

And I woke up today feeling so irritated and fat. First I got grumpy with my mom, and felt terrible about it, then I just grunted at my cat (a guess a little something like a caveman), then I got really irritated with myself and snapped at myself , then I thought about everything that I ate, looked in the mirror and decided that I was clearly getting fat, and snapped at myself again.

GAHHHHHHHHHHHH

It's amazing how negative energy promotes negative energy.

Maybe if I went out and cleaned ...oh I dunno.... like the local Freeway, I would have gone to bed and woken up with daisies falling all around me to pretty music and birds and squirrels singing and flying rainbows. I would have let out a giggle, and pranced like a ballerina to the bathroom.

Okay I lied again, as I'm sure you can clearly tell, there is no such thing as CC giggling......Or prancing for that matter.

Oh but I do like banging my head against the wall, both metaphorically and realistically.
It's such a great exercise and I don't know why people just don't do that instead of spending hundreds of dollars on yoga and meditation. They could be using that money on car insurance!

Or they could switch to Geico and save hundreds of dollars on car insurance and use that money to buy therapy classes for their local medical student.

Who like a fellow author once very clearly pointed out, is YOUR FUTURE DOCTOR.


And the end. That's the happy ending you get with this post............yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

CC, out

Friday, November 5, 2010

Surprise!

The story goes a little something like this.

I'm sitting in the den, minding my own business, watching random youtube videos on the Hubster's macbook as usual. (My laptop is crappy and takes 10 minutes just to load up) I had a bunch of tabs open and what not. Then I hear someone rustling in the kitchen then starting walking up the stairs.

Lo and behold it was the Hubster. He comes right into the den, closes all my tabs and shuts the laptop.

"What the heck! I was doing stuff yo!" 

"Yea but its MY laptop. So I can do whatever I want with it."

"Excuse me? You just closed everything I was looking at!!"

"So? Its mine. I own it. Just like I own you." He has the most serious look ever at this point

"WHAT? Are you serious? I'm not your property homie. What's wrong with you?"

"Go get me some juice." He walks off and lays down in the bedroom

I of course storm into the bedroom super mad. "Get you some juice?? How dare you talk to me like that."

"Just go downstairs and get me some juice" Now he starts gesturing me to go away.

"Why are you treating me so crappy right now? Seriously." Then I walked downstairs to the kitchen even though I really just wanted to beat the Hubster.

Upon entering the kitchen I saw this big white box on the table.

Hmm... weird. What's this? 

I pick up the box and start turning it looking for a sticker or something that said what it was.

OMG. 

On the side, very small and discreet, the box said "macbook."

"OMG OMG OMG!!!!"

The Hubster came down smiling. I opened the box and inside was a fresh beautiful brand new macbook!

"You are so annoying!! Thank you thank you thank you!!"


The end.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Babies

I'm not sure what to do with them. I don't hate them. In fact kids used to be my specialty when I was around 8-10 years old. I even liked scaring them, something controlled chaos never let's me or anyone else forget. I don't understood her fetich with the idea of it. Perhaps it's humorous imagining me scaring kids, looking like a fetus myself.

Throughout the years kids have progressively started to fear me. I'm talking about looking at me and bawling. Am I too cute or something??

Don't be silly. You can never be too cute.

I read somewhere that in cartoons they make the good guys look jolly and round and happy. So the good guys have softer features than the bad guys. And the bad guys are pointy kind of like Jafar from Aladdin.

My face is long and kind of pointy. Like Jafar.

So I'm used to kids backing up against the wall and screaming or crying when they look at me. I don't want to make the situation worse so I do what's best. I don't go crazy all over them. And I don't get how people gush over kids. I feel like a loser thinking about doing it. I'm turning red right now just thinking about it.

But the past few weeks have been different. At the mosque during prayer a baby crawled up next to me and screamed happily and then grabbed my arm. I froze. WHAT DO I DO WITH THIS THING LATCHING ON TO MY ARM!? Since I'm not used to breaking out in baby talk I just smile and slowly take his hand like I want to and move it. Well that's what I woukd have attempted to do. Thank the Lord his little sister grabbed him away.

And then I ran into this other baby. Well, the baby's mom. She's my friend. And he was a happy baby who'd go to anyone. And he was all smiley and yayyyy towards me and so I pretended to be yayyy back lol. But then he didn't cry!!

I'm wondering why babies are all happy to see me now. It's weird. And different. So I decided to not be so indifferent toward them if they seem to like me.

Today a girl called me "Mama". Mama. She insisted my name was Mama.

And I look more pointy than ever. So I have no idea what happened or why babies are flocking to me. But I'll take it. You do realize how embarrassing it is when babies look at you and scream and start crying as soon as you hold them, don't you? My darling sister makes it worse by saying something like, "OMG FU what did you do to her?" and then everyone in the room gives you the death glare.

My life has changed. I live in a world where babies are no longer out to make me feel like a monster. I suppose I should accept this change and try to get to know them, too. But I won't make baby noises and be all up in their faces and try to eat their feet. That's just weird.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Ham burger please! Sorry, our menu is halal-only.


Wearing a veil in public places may be banned in France, however that didn't stop the second largest retailer in the country from starting a new line of 22 halal-only restaurants.

Halal Digest reports The Quick company, which owns 362 restaurants in France, can be compared to McDonald's going halal in the U.S.

Read more: http://www.ifanca.org/newsletter/2010_10.htm

Halal I'm lovin' it T-Shirt
http://www.redbubble.com/people/nuhsarche/t-shirts/1623478-4-halal-im-lovin-it

Journalist

Sunday, October 10, 2010

The Pregnancy Scare

The pregnancy scare...

Positive Pregnancy Test - Pregnancy

If you're married or sexually active you probably know what I mean.

I really hate dealing with it. So I had my period back in the end of August, right? Yea so granted I have a pretty regular cycle you would think I'd get it again at the end of September, correct? Wrong.

Guess how late I was.

Just guess.

2 WEEKS. That has never happened before. So after the first few days I'm thinking hey no big deal. Then the first week passes and I'm thinking "oh crap, what if I'm pregnant?" Even though I technically have a .001% chance of getting pregnant...

Babies are wonderful. Really, they are. But I have a work and school and other things to do right now let alone have a little child take over my existence. Sigh. I always pray to God, "Oh God, please don't grant me the blessing of a child just yet because I personally don't feel ready. But if you're going to grant it anyhow please please please make me content with it. Ameen."

Anyhow, I found my my mom and sister were all 2 weeks late too which made me feel a LOT better. Thank God I just got my period yesterday. Woo hoo!

In other news I finally started using tampons. A word of the wise to pad-users, tampons are so freaking amazing! Pads feel so uncomfortable and like diapers for reals. With tampons, you just put 'em in and move on with life. Its amazing!

Friday, October 1, 2010

Feet.

I don't have a computer.
It died about 3 weeks ago and now I need a new one.
So I have been MIA and my google reader's piled up with probably thousands and thousands of blog posts I have to read.

Anyways, I'm posted in surgery right now.

I almost blacked out on my first day.

Why? Because in the wards most cases there are post-operative. So we have to do antiseptic dressings of the wounds. One the first day we did rounds and the doctors checked out all the wounds and etc and make sure the patient was okay. The very last patient was a diabetic patient. He had gangrene of more than half his foot and some toes were missing.

I could handle everything else, but whenever I see a diabetic foot I get light headed. So naturally I almost blacked out.

It's so embarrassing:
Nurse: HURRY UP AND GET A BED READY!!
Ward boy: There's a patient coming in???
Nurse: NO, IT'S FOR THE DOCTOR.

And with all the patients watching. ha. hahahaha. No.

And hour later in the outpatient clinic the doctor told me to clean another diabetic foot. I told him there was a 97% chance I was going faint so he best be there.

If you don't control your blood sugar levels you can get gangrene and your toes might fall off. Yesterday there was a man with an ulcer so deep I could see his bones. People in India present very late to the hospital, thinking things will get better. The sad thing is, they present so late that a lot of cases don't get better.

Anyways, the point is if you are diabetic, and if you are fond of your feet and of walking and going to the bathroom by yourself and other such luxuries, then control your blood sugar levels. Oh and the sooner you see a doctor, the better.

But yayy for me, I can do dressings without wanting to faint or throw up.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Mission: Impossible...unless it's Walmart?

I started today with a mission: To organize and re-decor my house with as little money as possible and only with things that I deem as necessary

Medical school's starting in one month insh'Allah (read: Please Don't Let anything go wrong God)...and I'm imagining my home, functioning in a way that is least stressful for my parents (Let's face it...what WILL they do without me?) and easily as possible to maintain for my brothers, though they probably don't have the word 'maintain' anywhere near their human capabilites (insert: Frustration)

I mean I'm not saying I'm the most organized or the type that's a walking Mr. Clean commercial either, but I'm not as bad as my brothers, or so I tell people.

So I went to the mall today looking for some things, like a new toothbrush holder, the kind that won't accumulate water at the bottom of it, and a new way to organize the spoon drawer so the contents don't explode on whatever idiotic guest that opens it, and a small china cabinet like thing so I can free up some space for dishes, and a dish rack so the dishes can dry on that instead on whatever else that is used as a replacement (my brothers are the geniuses in charge of the dishes) and a couple other things.

I hit up T.J.Maxx, see some promising things, call my mom and she says "You'll find it for cheaper at a Dollar store"

I hit up a Kitchen wares store, and my mom can't figure out how to work the texting on her phone to check the pictures I texted to her.

I hit up another store...Nothing. My mom calls and wants to know when I'm going to the Dollar store.

I go home. Grab my mom and go to DOLLAR KINGDOM. ( I dunno why that's in all caps, I'm kinda imagining those loud, ominous voices saying it followed by thunder)

And we don't find ANYTHING there.

Then Kmart. And it's actually, get this, the most expensive store.

At the very last minute before reaching home we hit up my mom's Disney World -Walmart.

And Thank God, I got to buy a couple of things . Yeah yeah, I have my qualms about Walmart too. But I dare not express them with the possiblity of my mom getting irritated and wacking any and all qualms out of me for the sake of "common sense"

Mothers.

To end my day, I almost hit a lady while reversing my car in the parking lot. It's not that I wasn't checking but this other car was standing behind me and I was staring at it and trying to reverse out so I wouldn't hit it. And I see a blur of pink speed walking. Brake my car. And hear a scream.
Well, it was more of a gasp-scream. And the blur of pink walks past me motioning at me...threateningly. I started apologizing to her. And the lady who was in the car that was distracting me rolls down her window, throws me a dirty stare, and asks the lady if she's okay.

Yeah I felt pretty bad. Thankfully she was fine. The blur of pink didn't see my car getting ready to get out probably cuz the car next to me was blocking her view and she was walking in a real hurry.

Mehh.. I started feeling a little better after some time. But my mom got really paranoid after that. She pointed out ANY and EVERY thing that was even trying to enter my field of vision the entire ride . (Insert: Exhausted by the time I reached home)


CC, out.

Monday, June 28, 2010

In Your Face

While walking out of the library I spotted two men and a woman in conversation. She sounded upset but I couldn't tell because she was talking low. As we got closer I guessed she was probably trying not to make a scene by yelling at one of the men in front of everyone.

And then

*Slapppp* across his face.

So much for not making a scene.

He didn't do anything. He just looked down and took it. I had to see who this woman was. She was older than him. Maybe his mother or sister, I couldn't tell. I turned to have a look at her face because if she was younger than him or his wife, he would probably gone all "Gurrrrl, I'm gonna CUT you" on her. Well that's my opinion, based off my observations here in the third world.

Anyways the point of my post was SHE SLAPPED HIM! I've never ever seen anyone slap anyone in the face ever. I got all ooh-drama-what-now/scared/sad/happy he didn't hit her back. I always wondered how it would feel to slap someone. Is that bad? Well, I'm a weakling so if I did it would probably tickle the person or something. Oh, I know, it doesn't matter how it feels, it's the principle of it. You just don't slap people in the face unless it's serious.

My friend wondered how it would feel, too.

Her: *Brother* come here for a minute.
Him: Yes, my dear older sister who I love so much and would do any-
Her: *slappp*
Him: Owwwww. *grabbing cheek* Why!??
Her: Sorry...I just wanted to know how it'd feel. Let me get you some ice.

True story.

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Words of the Week

Deliquesce \del-ih-KWES\

1.To melt away or to disappear as if by melting.

Example:

Since I've been accepted to my graduate school of choice my motivation to do well in my current classes has deliquesced.

---

Pukka \PUKH-uh\, adjective

1.Authentic; genuine.
2.Superior; first-class.

Example:

I am so baller. I am so pukka. So is this blog.