Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Babies

I'm not sure what to do with them. I don't hate them. In fact kids used to be my specialty when I was around 8-10 years old. I even liked scaring them, something controlled chaos never let's me or anyone else forget. I don't understood her fetich with the idea of it. Perhaps it's humorous imagining me scaring kids, looking like a fetus myself.

Throughout the years kids have progressively started to fear me. I'm talking about looking at me and bawling. Am I too cute or something??

Don't be silly. You can never be too cute.

I read somewhere that in cartoons they make the good guys look jolly and round and happy. So the good guys have softer features than the bad guys. And the bad guys are pointy kind of like Jafar from Aladdin.

My face is long and kind of pointy. Like Jafar.

So I'm used to kids backing up against the wall and screaming or crying when they look at me. I don't want to make the situation worse so I do what's best. I don't go crazy all over them. And I don't get how people gush over kids. I feel like a loser thinking about doing it. I'm turning red right now just thinking about it.

But the past few weeks have been different. At the mosque during prayer a baby crawled up next to me and screamed happily and then grabbed my arm. I froze. WHAT DO I DO WITH THIS THING LATCHING ON TO MY ARM!? Since I'm not used to breaking out in baby talk I just smile and slowly take his hand like I want to and move it. Well that's what I woukd have attempted to do. Thank the Lord his little sister grabbed him away.

And then I ran into this other baby. Well, the baby's mom. She's my friend. And he was a happy baby who'd go to anyone. And he was all smiley and yayyyy towards me and so I pretended to be yayyy back lol. But then he didn't cry!!

I'm wondering why babies are all happy to see me now. It's weird. And different. So I decided to not be so indifferent toward them if they seem to like me.

Today a girl called me "Mama". Mama. She insisted my name was Mama.

And I look more pointy than ever. So I have no idea what happened or why babies are flocking to me. But I'll take it. You do realize how embarrassing it is when babies look at you and scream and start crying as soon as you hold them, don't you? My darling sister makes it worse by saying something like, "OMG FU what did you do to her?" and then everyone in the room gives you the death glare.

My life has changed. I live in a world where babies are no longer out to make me feel like a monster. I suppose I should accept this change and try to get to know them, too. But I won't make baby noises and be all up in their faces and try to eat their feet. That's just weird.

9 comments:

Falling Up said...

Apologies in advance for typos and weird sentences. I'm getting used to the touch screen

aimie bahirah said...

LOL! looks like someone has gotten the baby-fever too! =p

MarjnHomer said...

awwwwwwwww babies are cute until you have your own so enjoy!

C said...

How about blowing bubbles on their bellies? lol My daughter is just like you,kids aren't scared of her but she wants nothing to do with them, not a maternal bone in her body. She's 18 and I hope the proposals don't start or else I will have to tell them about her phobia.

AL said...

since when do jafar and jasmine look alike??

and i can't do baby talk either. i hate it. can't do it. people think im weird for it but i just can't.

Constructive Attitude said...

eat their feet? what the??

i can do baby talk, only around my family though. in front of other ppl im just like frozen or something.

Amalia said...

I could have written this same post this time last year.
I was never good with babies, I avoided them as I was scared they would cry when I got them and I would be so embarrased. I could never do the baby talk etc.

However now I have my own I am always holding my friends babies and have to admit to baby talk as well. And my little girl loves tummy kisses and feet kisses and all those cheesy things you do with babies and it's so much fun to watch her smiling and laughing :)

Mark said...

It has to be the energy that you putting out, babies and puppies respond to our energy. Sounds like you are radiating love and light.

PI said...

awwwww @ mark

and awwww,tru dat @
"since when do jafar and jasmine look alike??" oh snap homie


and babies love me. except your little sister when she was a baby haha