Sushi and Crepes

It's Wedding Season; revisited

I wrote a post on weddings in Hyderabad, India a while ago. While I was writing it I felt like I was doing it half-heartedly and in a hurry. That post haunts me to this day. I literally shudder when I think about it. So I'd like to rewrite this post, give it another shot and hopefully be satisfied with this one. Since wedding season is here {summer and winter}, I thought this would be a good time to do it. Indian weddings have a LOT of parties leading up to the wedding and after the wedding. I'm covering the actual wedding reception itself. The Nikah, or wedding ceremony is simply. There is a small speech about marriage followed by agreement of the bride and groom.

I used to be a punctual person. Until I moved to India. When there was a wedding I'd force my sister to rush getting ready and scramble into the car. Traffic in Hyderabad was never light, except for the odd hours of the night. It would take at least an hour to get to the wedding hall with traffic, fifteen minutes without. After arriving to the venue, we'd find that we are extremely early, despite being half and hour to 45 minutes later than the time given on the invitation.

The stage is beautifully decorated with flowers hanging on string to create a backdrop, as well as large flower arrangements near the area the bride is to sit. It's either a velvet chair or couch, or the traditional way is to sit on the floor on a velvet cloth with gold thread in an uncomfortable pose. In front of the stage are chairs arranged facing the stage. Usually the first few rows are fancy chairs or benches that closer members of the bride and grooms family sit. Behind them are plastic chairs everybody else sits on. This I have seen at the most extravagant weddings as well. Now that I think of it, it might be due to lack of storage space, or low maintenance, as Indian weddings are pretty big. I've been to a wedding where a couple thousand people have been invited! Oh, and men and women are seated in separate areas, as per religious requirements.

In India, the stages look something along the lines of this:

This is the more traditional way of sitting. The bride is supposed to be "shy" and look down, not speak. Meh. WHO CARES? A lot of older people do. It's the happiest day of your life, but you can't look it! Culture is weird.

In America, stages look more like this:

After what seems hours of waiting or so, the hall fills up with many, many people. Everyone is invited to weddings in India. Sometimes you never even met the bride or the family, you just are a coworker or friend of someone related to the wedding party. The mailman, the tailor, the neighbors, drivers, maids. Teachers, classmates, co-workers. Parents' friends, co-workers. The jeweler. The bride and grooms friends' cousins, siblings families and friends. The list is pretty exhausting.

If we're lucky dinner will be served by 10:30 PM.  There is a separate area where dinner is served. Usually, they have rounds for eating, as not everyone can fit into the hall. There are tons of people, after all. You're best bet, and in my case, my only chance of having a shot at dinner is at the first sitting. During the second sitting, drinking glasses and napkins are not provided. The plates are rewashed and wet, sometimes dirty. The serving spoons have oil on them, as Indians eat with their hands. And the food is not brand new. Meaning that they will take the left overs from the first sitting and serve them in the next rounds. Which is OK, I mean don't waste food. But I'd like clean serving spoons.

Because of the advantages of the first round, there is a mad dash when dinner is served. I probably was unlucky one or two times. I sit near the entrance to the dining hall, I walk fast, but don't run. I am a lady, after all. I know it does seem rather barbaric, but once you sit in the second or third round, you do not want to make that mistake again. Another reason for the rush is that Indian weddings are so late! They start as late as 10 pm, sometimes the bride doesn't show up until 10:30. It's kind of ridiculous if you ask me. I learned to eat a light meal  or snack before the wedding.


The food usually does not disappoint. Because I am a girly girl, I love it when they serve naan - an Indian flat bread - in the shape of a HEART. So romantic. Usually there is soup with meat in it to start with along with shrimp, lamb kabobs, chicken kabobs, fish. At a Muslim wedding there will definitely be a meat overload. This is served with different types of bread, the naan, as I've mentioned as well as some more oily or buttery breads. Following this huge amount of appetizers come the star of the meal, the biryani (rice) along with the accompanying gravies and yogurt. Followed by dessert which is Indian or ice cream served on cake with dried fruit and nuts.

This is dessert served in a clay pot. It's like full fat ice cream. So delicious. I put so many pictures of food, the best part!

Here, Muslim brides wear something called a Khada Dupatta. It's pretty much worn specifically in the region/city of India I am from. It's basically wearing a long top and pants and then being wrapped up in 6 meters of fabric. I used to hate it but now I love it. Even though I find it difficult to walk in. Only royalty used to wear these dresses, and I like to think of myself as such. Seriously, though, with jewelry, and if you wear it right, it looks grand. The first photos is a really simple, non-bridal one. The second is a bridal one. But the brides here wear heavier ones this is also pretty simple in comparison and I can't find a heavier one online and I don't want to post photos of my friends up here for religious reasons as they aren't covered up properly.

The bride also has henna on her hands and feet. Usually up to the elbows and a mid-calf. It costs about 100-200 dollars when you convert the currency. Which is nothing! In America, I got a quote for $1000. But I got lucky and found a super skilled Henna Artist who did it for much less.

After or during dinner the bride will her her photo shoot with the groom. And since it's so late, the guests will get ready to go. There is no dancing at the Muslim weddings. The dancing is done on the days leading up to the wedding. Sometimes there is entertainment. But I don't find it entertaining. Mostly it's old guys singing old school songs. haha. In America, there are dances, speeches, slideshows, entertainment, etc. But I'm mostly discussing how it's done "back home".

Anyways, when it's finally time for the bride and groom to leave, the bride and her parents and family cry because she is leaving the nest. So emotional. Waah waah waah. 

I tried to cry. But I didn't. My parents were like, "Peace out!" haha. Good thing, or else my makeup would have been all over the place. It was kind of like this. "Bye, girl, see you tomorrow!"

Outfit Of The Day

To show you more of my lifestyle, I guess I'll be posting more outfits and food and everyday photos here as well. Maybe not of my face, but little tidbits of my life here and there. :) The above photo is what I wore to a dinner a few weeks ago.

If you are new o this blog, you may not recall the post regarding the Muslim women's dress code. If you are interested in the requirements and how we stay stylish while covered up, click here to read all about it!

Living out of a suitcase

I'm sitting in a hotel after a not so hot "hot" breakfast. The eggs contained bacon residue because I think  they cooked it on the same stove. Muslims can not eat pig or pig products, in case you were wondering. The potatoes were cold and hard, my plastic fork could not stab them. My toast popped out of the toaster and landed on some spilled juice on the counter. #firstworldproblems But at least I have food. So I will stop complaining...now. 

I have been doing a bit of traveling lately. While I do like going to various places, I have not had a chance to relax and do my own thing. I want to spend a quiet day or two at home. One thing I don't enjoy about traveling is living out of a suitcase. Packing light hasn't been one of my strong points. Unpacking after returning is an even bigger hurdle. 

Packing for a wedding is much worse! Fancy Indian clothes are not light. Then there's the jewelry, shoes and makeup. It is impossible to go for a weekend with a carry on bag. Indians have parties the days before and days after the actual wedding. So we have to pack clothes, shoes jewelry and makeup for all those events. It's ridiculous, if you ask me. But it's also fun and tiring. But if I could ever travel without going to an Indian event, count me in!

I haven't been going to any weddings or events lately. These trips are strictly for business. It's been pretty relaxed and care free. But there's no place like home. I want to spend a day curled up in bed with a good book and periodic naps in between. Like a cat, maybe with more reading than napping. But knowing me, only one of those days is enough! I start to feel unproductive and need to do something that makes me feel accomplished. I guess it's good that I chose the profession that I did. :)

Mid-week pick me up

Out with the Old

I am a changed woman! I love to throw things away. I used to be sentimental about stuff, but over the years I have learned to toss out unnecessary items that I know I will never look at again and won't care to. For example, things my classmates signed for me back in middle school. We had this phase where we had everyone sign everything. I had poster boards, Tshirts, caps, notebooks, etc. All signed by the same people, half of whom I no longer am in touch with either. I threw out everything except a small baseball cap. Which I think I ended up tossing out because I can't find it anywhere. There weren't any personal messages on there, just generic "Keep in touch!" Stuff. So that went away.

I do hang on to cards and letters. I think they are a little more personal to me, so I keep those. Old shirts, socks, binders from my classes, notebooks, gone! I attribute this to having lived in India. That was the first time in my life I moved anywhere and I couldn't take everything with me. While in India we moved house 4 times! It was so annoying and even more annoying with so much stuff. It was amazing how much junk one can collect over the years.

A year and a half of moving back to America I got married and had to move again. So all this moving in such a short amount of time definitely did me some good in the clutter department! It wasn't easy to part with things people would find sentimental, but I got over it. Now I can't wait to throw things out. I've crated a list of things that help me get my life organized.

1. If I didn't look at it on over a year {in my case, many many years}, I shouldn't keep it. It's not worth it. Yes, some of my stuff is from my childhood, but I have memories and photos and that's enough for me. Everything else just makes my space look unorganized.

2. Clothes, shoes and accessories: Torn, discolored, or worn out items need to be tossed out. If you were to - God forbid - be in a car accident and needed strangers to help you get out, would you be embarrassed by what you were wearing? If the answer is yes, then get rid of it. Clothes that don't fit right and have not over the past year should go. Anything you can't style in a way that you like should also go. If you MUST keep old clothing, store it in a box or suitcase, throw a box of mothballs in there and put it in the basement or other storage area. Ideally, give it away. Accessories and shoes you would not be caught dead in should also go. If it STILL has the receipt on it, you haven't worn it because you love it but it doesn't look right on you yet, just return it. Places like TJ Maxx and Marshalls will give you store credit, no matter how old the item. Buy something else that fits well  and flatters your body and chances are you'll wear it a lot more.

3. Minimalism is key. Why do I need 3 deodorant sticks? I don't. I also don't need 298 pens and highlighters cluttering my desk. Yes, I am a student but I don't need that much. Give them to a doctor friend. Do you know how quickly some of them lose pens on a daily basis? A lot.

4. Think about how nice and organized everything will look once all the junk it gone. Every few months I de-clutter and I go through at least one large garbage bag every time. Stuff adds up. For  receipts, bills, etc buy an accordion folder with tabs in it. That way you can keep all your important papers in one place and know exactly where it is when you need it.

5. That's all I can think of that works for me. When I'm bored I like to look up organization tips or watch videos on YouTube. That really gets me inspired to make a move. After all the stuff is gone, you can work on the best part. For me, at least. Decorating!! Making it all pretty/fun/pleasing to the eyes.

mid-week pick me up

Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays are my blah days and I'm sure most of you can agree. Ironically, I do not mind Mondays. They encourage me to work herder. A new week, new beginnings, new chance to do good.  

But today is not Monday and the weather has been devoid of sun for the past week or two. I have turned into a fat hermit. Eating my feelings and all. I googled cupcakes this morning to get me started today and this is what I found! I love how neat some of these are, but I'm sure I wouldn't like to taste the fondant. I always try it and always end up not eating it. But it makes everything look clean and polished! Have a happy hump day and there's a new REAL blog post coming soon! haha :)

Mid-week Pick me up

I am very intrigued by finger art. Some of these people got super creative! I'll let the photos speak for themselves. :) {edit} Scrolling through them, I realized a lot are kind of gory or gross. But they were more creative then the lovey dovey ones. Haha. {/edit}

Pray for me :)

The last few days have been gloomy and full of rain showers.  I usually LOVE the rain, but after a few days of no sun, it can really get to me. I think I suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder. Or maybe it's the fact that I'm studying all day errday that makes me sad and stressed. Taking away the sun just adds to my mood.

Muslims also believe that the rain is a mercy and a good time to ask God for help, stuff or anything else.  Usually when it's raining I'll get a text, read a tweet or get an email from one of my Muslim friends saying, "It's raining, remember to pray for me, too!" I'm also guilty of doing the above. 

 I do love thunderstorms, though. I like it when the whole house gets quiet and peaceful, despite the cracking thunder outside and the flashes of lightning. I like to be at home curled up with a good book and some herbal tea. I also like to go online and read blogs, maybe even get inspired to posts here. 

Which reminds me: we received a comment on an earlier post regarding our presence in the blogosphere by Silly Billy, "i missed the stories here and there but you guys need to update and let others know you're updating too"

I am going to reply to that here, because I'm sure others might be thinking and suggesting we do the same. I know I did. I am trying to make an attempt to be regularly posting on here, but I'm not really commenting on other blogs, nor am I promoting new posts {I am not sure about the other authors} because I myself am pretty busy and can't expect much traffic or comments from our readers and other bloggers simply because I do not have time to write comments on other blogs. I don't want to be at the receiving end and not give anything in return. So I'll probably be a lot more active in the blogging world soon after my last exam. Which will be soon, I hope!