Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Half Married

I was married to a man who lives about 3 minutes from my parent's house. While I was thrilled to live nearby, I knew sometimes I'd want my distance.

Living close-by means getting to see my family at least once a week without any hassle. We attend the same mosque, generally know the same people, and all our family who live in Michigan live within a 5-10 minute drive.

That also means I cannot stay overnight as often, make shorter visits since I can "go over at anytime I want" theoretically. It's hard to plan things with just my husband and I. We'll get phone calls to go over and visit the parents.

The 3-minute distance is just enough distance to always need a ride (since I don't have my own car), have surprise visits, have to pick up phone calls at odd times to comfort tensions in the house, and get stuck in the middle of my old life as the "mediator."

Sometimes I feel half married. I still play an active role in my former home. I wonder what it'd be like to get away from both sides and start focusing more on myself and my future family.

I think I'll end up lonely (lol).


JaLpArI - tHe MeRmAiD said...

is it not natural to be discontent?? lol!!! trust me you are lucky to be close to your parents.... think of the time they'd need you to take care of them, illness and such things... had you been away, you'd fell so helpless in not being able to do anything for them....

Falling Up said...

I think I can understand what you mean. It can be frustrating. But we all want the opposite of what we have and think about the cons of living further away and I'm sure it'll make you feel better, inshaAllah. It's hard balancing both families, May Allah SWT make it easy for you.

Youthful Wisdom said...

Moving about 15-20 minutes is the key. Close enough to visit frequently but far enough to decline random visitations or asking of favors.

Constructive Attitude said...

i love living near home. ALHAMDULILAH