Tuesday, November 25, 2008

"An Extravagance is something that your spirit thinks is a necessity" ~ Bern Williams

I just bought a beautiful dress.

It has ah-maaazing color amazing work on it. I went to a few stores after I saw it because it was a little expensive and I thought I'd look around. It was those loved-it-so-much-I-gasped-when-I-saw-it type of dresses so nothing at the other stores looks good. And now I feel really bad.

It doesn't help that as we went to pay my sister gave me a little smirk and said, "Do you feel nauseaus yet?"

So now I dedicate this post to making me feel less guilty.
Reasons why it's OKAY I splurged and that it was worth the price:

1. I needed it.
2. It was gorgeous.
3. I've been looking for this color forever and finally found it AND it's pretty.
4. My sister buys clothes that are a lot more expensive than mine for COLLEGE so I think I can get a little pricier dress for a wedding. She even gets more expensive dresses than I do. {she will kill me if she reads this}
5. I never use my allowance on myself {yes, I still get one lol}. My mom gave me a budget and the dress wasn't in it. So I paid for the difference out of my pocket..which would have otherwise gone on food. Really..who needs food?

These reasons aren't really valid. haha. So I just talked to my mom and she was laughing at me. So now I feel a little better. Because if my mother is okay with it then I should, too. If she wasn't she'd be like, "Falling Uppp!!!! Oh Em Gee WHY would you do that!?}

Let's tie Islam into this shall we? Islam is about moderation. Everything should be in moderation, except maybe worship. I don't think there's such thing as too much worship unless you start ignoring your family and job and stuff.

According to Purification of the Heart, Wantonness is the desire for always wanting more. If you have less than someone you should be happy for your blessings and grateful that you are not in a worse situation. And if you have more than most people you should be very grateful for what you have. There's a saying that goes something like in terms of worldy things you should compare yourself to the one who has less than you and be grateful of your situation. And for religion and spirituality you should compare yourself to the one who is better off than you so that you shall strive to be like them.

How to cure this? According to this book by feeling voluntary hunger and remembering death. By fasting or going hungry you can remind yourself how lucky you are to know when and where your next meal will be. If you are among the lucky ones, your meal will be clean and cooked properly. Maybe even hot. Hunger can also remind you of how some people can't even afford the basic necessities to live {food, clothing, shelter} let alone a cell phone, laptop, shoes, cars, etc. There are people out there starving to death and here are people trying to LOSE WEIGHT because they have too much food.

By remembering death you can get reminded that once you die people cry for you for a day or two and then life moves on. The pretty things you bought don't matter anymore. That stuff doesn't go in your grave with you. And even if it did, would it matter? You're gone. The only thing that can help you is how good you lead your life. Your deeds. Your actions. Your intentions. How you treated you parents. How you were honest. This will all help. Good character is what you need then.

So comparing the beginning or my post and the end, I sound like a hypocrite, right? I don't think so. First of all, they don't take returns in India so fat chance of me getting my money back. {el oh el} Second of all I'm human and make mistakes. I made a mistake, I feel guilty and I'll try to not do it again. The end. God isn't mean. :)

And it doesn't mean that I can't have nice things. God likes to see the blessings of his servants on them. If you're rich and can afford better clothes, then buy them. But don't be so extravagant and go out of your means or to the point of showing off with it. Extravagance also depends on how much money you have. And one must also be careful with being too miserly as well {another disease of the heart}. Balance is the key.

Some related quotes from the Quran:

"Obey God and His Messenger, and dispute not among yourselves lest you falter and your strength departs from you. And be patient, for God is with the patient. And do not be like those who leave their homes filled with excessive pride about your state, showing off before people and preventing others from the way of God. And God encompasses what they do." {Quran 8:46-47}

"God does not love those who exult" {Quran 28:76}


c.c. said...

explain what exult means
and thank you for a wonderful post!

Ghadir said...

the whole part about how ur sister buys more stuff than u do that are alottt more expensive and for college sounds like my problem with my sister hadil...she has an addiction haha

Constructive Attitude said...

I've always felt guilty when I spend way too much on clothes or unnecessary things. But then I make myself feel better by saying that:
a.) It's my money I'm spending, not my parents.
b.) I deserve it because I'm a hard worker.
and c.) I try to buy someone else something too. For some reason that eases the guilt as well.

And I always feel guilty when I have fun too. I dont know if that makes sense, or if that is even relevant to what you're talking about. But I just felt like sharing it.

Artistic Logic said...

^ CA next time you feel guilty in the shopping mall, think of me too =)

Mrs. Cullen said...

ok this post was for me. u might as well have said ATTN: MRS. CULLEN


Mrs. Cullen said...

and i must say we are two different people falling up. you don't like food. wow.

Snake Charmer said...

I love the title :)

...Love said...

Umm +2 pts for the quotes title. I rarely feel guilty for purchases except when it's on food...so +4 for having the willingness to resist.

POST PICTURES. I wanna see.

Falling Up said...

hmm its not posting my comments?? third times a charm..

CC look it up! the dictionary if your friend. boo for not knownig this.

And I was eating and writing this post at the same time. haha. But I do have a huge fear of gaining weight..sad i know.

MarjnHomer said...

actually there is moderation in worship. if you fast day and night or pray day and night, then you are exhausting yourself to such a point that you ignore everything else around you. you should worship as much your health and body lets you. if you feel tired, sleep. if your famished from fasting, take a break and start again when you feel up to it. your body has a right over you and you will be held accountable for how you took care of it on the day of judgment.