Intimacy is being seen and known as the person you truly are.

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Photo originally uploaded by Me on Flickr.

The Façade of Free Speech

Ahhhhh!!!!! I am so sick and tired of having people who don't know me, my family or my friends classify us all as the same as those retards on tv who've decided that the only way to get noticed are to kill people! Islam is like a rainbow with two extremes and all colors on the spectrum in between. Yes you are going to find people who agree with militant and fundamentalist views in America and around the world but there are BILLIONS OF MUSLIMS! Are you going to sit here and tell me that we are ALL terrorists? That we all believe in the same thing?? We can't even agree on whether or not it's acceptable to pray with nail polish on!! (I exaggerate but you get the point). You can even just take all of the authors on this blog and put us in a room and ask us fundamental questions about God and Islam and life and you'll get almost 9 different answers to each question. Our families and friends and environments shape us into the people we are today, religion is an incredibly huge aspect of it but it mingles with culture and our families unique perspectives on life.

I had this very informative sarcastic post all written up about the "free speech summit" that had taken place in Florida yesterday but at the end of it I realized none of my anger had bled through. Because I am angry I am so (wow I want to cuss). Look this is my country and I don't mean that in the patriotic sense of the word- but literally, this is where I was born. Where I grew up. This is the place that had shaped my ideas and what I want to gain out of life for myself and for my family. So for a man who is supposed to represent the American people (Rep. Hasner), for him to co-sponsor a summit under the façade of free speech, but in reality to lambaste anyone and everyone who follows Islam- and on top of that NO-ONE, no Democrats especially no Republicans- coming out and decrying this...!! WTH??!!!

So what am I going on and on about? Yesterday a "free speech summit" had been organized by the Florida Security Council who are a self-declared counter-Jihad movement. Educating people on the threat and danger of radical Islam which apparently to them is all Islam. Their keynote speaker of the evening was Dutch parliamentarian Geert Wilders who had compared the Quran to Hitler's Mein Kampf and stated at the event last night that: "Islam is not a religion. Islam is a totalitarian political idealogue. Islam's heart lies at the Quran, and the Quran is a book that calls for hatred, that calls for violence, for murder, for terrorism, for war and submission...We should all stop pretending Islam is a religion...The right to religious freedom should not apply to Islam."

He also goes on to say that we should stop Muslim immigration to the west and that we need to remove Muslims from western countries and to stop the building of Mosques and called for the closing down of Islamic schools calling them "fascist institutions".

I am so very frustrated at this situation, wth is one supposed to do? CAIR- the Council on American Islamic Relations came out before the event and after the event to decry it but lets be honest- no-one listens to them! It's like Muslims are like AIDS back in the 80's where no-one knew what the hell it was and everyone stigmatized everyone that had it. We need a voice we need people to know that this "summit"- IS NOT ACCEPTABLE. Not only not acceptable but will not be tolerated! What do they expect us to do after they compare us to Hitler and Mussolini?? Just sit back and be ok with it??? WTF?! (sorry CC)

I did a google search on this "summit" and I have not yet seen one article- except for CAIR's- that comes out against it. Everyone seems to think that Hasner and Wilders are heroes for speaking out against hatred ...wow. The Muslim community needs to wake up and reclaim their country otherwise we lose it to people like Hasner. Most Muslims believe that since Obama's won, the anti-Muslim wing of the country has dissipated into nothingness. There is no bigger misconception. Change does not occur because of change of leadership.

I wish I could end this post on a brighter note. But I can't. All I can hope for is that this event inspires Muslims and non-Muslims alike in America to rise up against hate speech and make their voices heard, otherwise they will be replaced by the voices of Wilders and those like him.

The List of 8's

Girl in Stiletto tagged the blog with The List of 8's.

The rules are:
1. Mention the person that tagged you
2. Complete the list of 8's
3. Tag 8 of your wonderful blogger friends. Go and tell them you tagged them!

8 things I'm looking forward to:
1. This horrible finals week to end to I can finally see my friends
2. Wearing my yummy dresses and shoes. :)
3. All the time I can spend cooking and baking this break
4. Going places
5. Relaxing and Enjoying it instead of worrying about studying. Fat chance that'll happen.
6. Getting caught up with other people's blogs.
7. Finishing my final year, God Willing.
8. Spending time with the family.

8 things I did yesterday:
1. Woke up early
2. Treadmill
3. Ate chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream
4. Played Mario with my little sister
5. Tried the chips ahoy white chocolate fudge cookies. Not as good as the original but everyone else loved them.
6. Replied to facebook messages. finally.
7. Remembered I had a twitter account and updated
8. Went to a party

8 things I wish I could do:
1. Wish I could fast forward my life to the point where I'm done with residency,
2. I wish I had a bottomless bank account where I could go on a fun shopping spree. And of course give most of that away to people who need it.
3. I wish I was smart. I have a good memory but not when it comes to the books. I have to work hard. I wish it was a bit easier for me.
4. Eat whatever I wanted and never gain weight.
5. Fly.
6. Have nothing to worry about.
7. Sneeze. Right now I feel like I have to but it won't come out.
8. Work out. I am too too lazy.

8 shows I watch:
1. I don't really watch a certain tv show. but in India all we look up is 90210 for some reason. lol.
2. ok I guess I'll list shows I like. Simpsons
3. The Office
4. Ugly Betty
5. I think there are a million funnier newer shows out there but this is all I know right now.
6. I like cooking shows, too :)
7.
8.

8 wonderful blogger friends I tag:

I tag anyone who reads this and wants to do this. I don't know who has been tagged and who hasn't and who enjoys doing that and who doesn't. So if you like doing stuff like this then I tag YOU.

Count your Blessings

So one of our friends found this amazing site ... www.bmylife.com. It's soo cool! You guys should all check it out! Anyhow, it really got me thinking. I was on the site and I just started thinking of all the blessings I had just today in my life. It's really therapeutic. I think I should do a psych study on it. I read an article once on how gratitude improves your health.

God says in the Qu'ran "And He gave you of all that you asked for, and if you count the Blessings of God, never will you be able to count them. Indeed, mankind is [generally] most unjust and ungrateful." [14:34]

One time after reading this I sat down and started writing all the blessings I had that I could think of. After about a minute I realized that I could keep going on and on and there would be no end. Even if we're not able to literally count our blessings I think it's so important to keep remembering them because it keeps you grounded. Things that make us upset don't seem to matter anymore.

So here's my new goal. To keep a blessings diary. Every night I want to take out just one minute to write a couple of blessings I had that day. What do you think?

Here's how it'll start:

1) I usually really hate teaching Sunday School but today my kids told me how much they'll miss me after I finish teaching and leave for Egypt this year.
2) My mom made breakfast this morning for the family and we all ate together at 9 AM
3) My med school buddy took her exam late Saturday night so we could hang out on Sunday.

Filling up gas is so complicated.

So remember how I was semi-complaining about how I look way younger than I am?

I TAKE IT ALL BACK!

I embarrass myself like no other. I don't do it often but when I do, it's pretty bad.

Yesterday we went to a bridal shower. Bridal shower = no boys = wear whatever you want. ;)

Anyways, my friend picked me up since she lives a few streets down and well, she couldn't get out the car without flashing people her sexy legs. We needed gas. And I offered to get out and fill it up.

Too bad I haven't done this in 5 years.
Too bad I was ALWAYS unsure of how to fill the stupid thing up.
BUT GOOD THING I LOOK SO YOUNG! Thank you, God.

So my sister and friend are in the car yelling me at what to do. They didn't start out by yelling but it ended like that because I am such a ditz when it comes to doing common things. They had to literally give me step by step instructions.
"Push 'credit card'."
"Where?"
"On the yellow touch pad."
"Where?"
"skdlfjsdgkld"

Then I thought we had to swipe the credit card instead of insert it. And I couldn't find the swiping thing because there wasn't one. I looked at the black boxy thing ten times and saw a picture of the credit card. I didn't do it because I really wanted to swipe!

So I finally pass the payment part and get the pumper thing in the car. Nothing happened.
"You have to pick the type of gas you want first."
"And exactly where the hell am I supposed to d- ....oh"
Oh I pushed that button five times. I guess I'm not strong enough or something because it wouldn't listen and I just stood there with the pump in my hand and NOT filling the car with gas. "Wow, you can't even tell it's filling gas anymore. Improved technology or something."
"That's because it isn't doing anything."

It was so hilarious. The guy next to us got a kick out of it. He shouted over, "Is it someone's first time filling up gas?"
"I haven't done this in a really really long time!" But he probably thought it was my first time since I look so young.

The guy at the cashier in the store was leaning over in front of the counter to get a better view of what I was doing.

Oh, this I feel horrible about. I opened the car door to get back in and it hit the gas pump box. I'm so dumb I underestimated how much force I should use. Luckily there was no damage.

So who wants me to fill up their gas tank?

Love thy neighbor..

How can I love my neighbors, when they're all a bunch of weirdos?

There is an ex-con living on one side of us that truly despises us because we wouldnt let him put up his fence on our property.

And then there's a Mexican family, that has fiestas every single day with live Mariachi bands that carry on until the wee hours of the morning, on the other side.


And at the present moment, as I sit here and type this, I look out the window to see the neighbors across the street--who claim to be "brothers"--trying to kill each other.

Literally.

One is saying to the other something about "saving" him. And then he goes on and kicks him in the stomach.

I'm sure they are just messing around. But I'm starting to think that they really aren't "brothers" and more like "brothas". Whatever that means.

Maybe I should call the police.

Mrs. Cullen: The Grown-up

Dear Friends,

Today I drove so far. I drove over 200 miles to a place and then 200 miles back. That is the furthest I have ever driven somewhere. I haven't even driven half that far somewhere. Yay me. I am really glad I made it home safe, thanks to God. Something sad happened though. While driving to the far away place, a pebble hit my windshield. I had to stop the car and make sure it did not create a hole. Thank God. It was just a scratch. Good thing it was not a bird. I don't have anything else to say. It was fun driving far away. I feel all grown up now.

Yours for the sake of Peace and Sisterhood,
Mrs. Cullen

Bzz Bzz ....no more? and other musings

It's called, Colony Collapse Disorder or CCD for short. It's the widespread phenomenon of Honey-bees just suddenly disappearing from beehives all over the world- without a trace. 2 days ago, for the run-up to Earth Day, my favortist channel CURRENT, ran a pod (3 min documentary) on the disappearance of bees. Now this was something I had heard of before but in this pod, the narrator was describing the impacts of the complete extinction of the Honey-bee. i.e. world wide starvation, extinction of a number plants, trees, animals and insects- so in short, chaos. Now I love CURRENT because well, they're awesome, but I couldn't wrap my head around the consequences of bees suddenly dying off- so I decided to research whether or not this was real, or just hype.

While no-one knows the causes of CCD, there are allot of theories being bandied around- which i'm not going to get into because well without proof, all of it is mere speculation. There are generally 2 camps scientists and bee biologists fall under, much like the issue of global warming. One camp suggests that Honey-bees dying off would be just a 30% drop in world pollination, food resources- although significant, not apocolyptic. The other camp (larger one I might add), suggests that the apparently random frequent incidents of CCD in commercial beehives are of great concern, for without Honey-bees, which are the worlds most prolific pollinators meaning most of your vegetables and all of your fruits come primarily from Honey-bee pollination- there will be massive food shortages i.e. starvation.

I think the scariest about all of this is that it's so tangible, I mean global warming affects most of us in small ways as of this moment without promise of more massive effects. But this, if this is truly as bad as allot of people are saying it is, we could see hunger around the world- the likes of which one cannot even begin to imagine. And whats worse- no-one knows what to do the combat it!!!!! All of our scientists are flabbergasted and flat-footed no-one even knows where to begin!! I seriously hope that governments take this seriously and fund research into this.

On to um..happier news, on April 15, the world saw the birth of it's first cloned camel- Injaz. Born in Dubai, in a country, hell- region, where camel racing is serious business. Scientists believe that camel cloning will be commonplace in the Arab world because of well, camel racing.

And an interesting tidbit, the first all-female species of Ant has been discovered in South America. The ants are complete clones of the Queen ant. The first all-female species was found in 2001, spider mites that were clones of their mothers. Whats interesting about this species is that if there ever were males who were born to the spider mites, a bacterium would be released to give the spider mite an immediate sex-change.

There are other things that I want to talk about, like the mayor San Francisco announcing his candidacy for Gov of Cali through twitter, or the torture memos that were released or the Special Investigations report by Congress, just released yesterday, on torture. Or that the number one city in America with the most birth control recipients is Denver- or even about the study that found birth control users are not able to grow muscle. But alas it is 5:54 in the morning and I have not yet slept enough to talk coherently about Dick Cheney or birth control, so I leave you with this, out there in the world- there is a 125 mph car made entirely of
vegetables that runs on chocolate. I kid you not.




With peace,
SC

Real Life vs Blogger Life

My sister thinks my blogging style and speaking style don't match up. I think she's right. My voice is high pitched and I get hyper and talk fast a lot of times. Especially when it's something I love or a debate on anything from world events to shoes.

And I don't speak about my actual life and what happens in it because that life is boring. I'm a med student and spend a little time studying, a little time wasting away my life or sleeping. My fault, but I feel like there isn't much to do here. I don't get out much because:

1. My friends can't get out that much. The Indian parents I know in MI and India generally have this rule if you go out you can't go out for the next two weeks or so. Luckily my parents have it every other day. lol.

2. I don't like going out because the guys here are pretty cheap. And stare and stare and stare. I don't want to knowingly subject myself to that. And since I don't wear the long robes {Burqa, Jilbaba, Abaya, etc} that some Muslim women wear and don't cover my face {a Niqab}, I'd rather stay inside.

So I end up blogging about little, dumb, yet life altering things like my cockroach incident, cheating or being caught without my head covering.

I am pretty shy and quiet. Not so much as before, though. Despite being the "serious" one in the family I am the one with the most friends and the most social. I make friends much more easily than my siblings. I tend to talk a lot more but not if I'm jet-lagged/sleepy/sick/had a bad day/find someone intimidating.

Ohhh and I hate hate hate small talk. Especially if it's with people I see regularly. If it's someone I don't know at all it's fine. But if I've known you for years, I don't like it. Which is why I'm always hesistant to come back and mingle with people I haven't seen in years so we have drifted and there's not much else to say because it's been so long we can't catch up in 2 minutes, hence the small talk. Maybe I should open up more so I don't die of boredom. I'll try it out next time. Luckily I have a bunch of friends it's not like that with.

I am on the serious side. My sister follows me around the house saying, "Aren't you glad you have such a funny sister? If I wasn't here you would have bored yourself to death!!" I don't think I'm boring. I just don't know how to crack jokes. I'm a joke killer, I'm not quick when it comes to making witty remarks. I can't help it. I'm not this way by choice. The rare occasions that I am witty everyone needs a replay of what I just said. lol.

Arright I didn't expect to open up so much on a public blog but I have. And I'm sure you are all sick of me writing about me. This blog is slowly turning into therapy or something. Of which I don't think I need, but whatevs.

Dear Readers

Some time not too long ago, you encountered a post by F.U. (HaHa F U...). And through this post she somehow managed to rev all of you up for a field trip to my room.

So you're curious about my room?

Some of you even threw across the theory, that I, THE Controlled chaos, have a room decorated with frills and the color pink. Maybe it is...

Maybe I have pink hearts covering my entire wall, with a bright pink bed and a lacey comforter, and unicorns dangling from the ceiling. And a carpet with pink butterflies and flowers.

Gosh golly if only you could see my room!












These rooms wouldn't even stand a chance!

And maybe I have four different guys in my house...

Or maybe I do have newspaper clippings ALL over my wall... And soon you will come to realize that the government is actually run by aliens from planet meow.

And frankly I can't care if I'm being lame P.I. (HaHa Pee!). And if I lose my friends because of my lameness, at least I'm not losing them from having a room so pink that they hurl.

Are you that curious about my room that you want to have a group field trip?
Go right ahead.

Just make sure to get your parental consent forms signed, and a waiver saying that neither me or my room will be held responsible for your health, mentally and physically.

And don't cry if you step on cereal or injure your foot by stepping on a pin.
And don't start whimpering when you find a greenish, black oozing sandwich or dishes from a couple months ago. Especially if you feel like you saw the "sandwich" move.
And don't start crying from the awful smell coming from my ever growing pile of laundry clothes.
And don't scream in pain every time you bump into or hit against a piece of my furniture. Or have something crash onto your head. F.Y.I if something does crash onto your head, you will be paying for the costs. (This will be included in the waiver)

Lovely to puke at Lovely to scream at the mold.
But if you break it Consider it sold!

And I will not be in a hurry to call 911 after you pass out or have a heart attack or whatever else possible syndrome involving the loss of consciousness.
And you may wish to leave as soon as you enter, in which case I may be tempted to keep you in my bedroom longer, to make you regret you decision. Again I will not be held responsible for any damages that occur during that time.
And if the "sandwich" has spores that may have entered your respiratory system....Wachya gonna do? Ask me to call 911 in a hurry?

I laugh at your naivety.

But not to worry, there are some things you don't have to worry about.

You can be grateful that the "sandwich" , my cat, myself and a couple of security spiders are the only living, moving things that can be found in my room. Actually my cat isn't too fond of entering my room, so the furry creature that you see is probably an older generation " sandwich". I call it "Ungu".

You can also be grateful that I will have unfinished packets of food, like chips or popcorn or candynfrom some time ago, in my room somewhere in the case you cannot escape from my room for some unknown reason.

And finally you WILL at the very least be able to satisfy your curiosity about the mystery known as my room.



P.S. Once you enter the room you can kiss any hopes of me serving bubble tea goodbye :-)

Curves

Curves, originally uploaded by Rabujee.

It's been a really stagnant Sunday, I should be writing portions of my final design submission or studying about radiation but all I've done so far is place my books on the bed this morning.... haven't cracked them open since. Walked past them, shifted them around, stared at them.... and that's about as much service as they'll get today.

Remember back in high school (God, I feel old starting a sentence like this) when seniors all spoke proudly of having "senioritis." Yea, I think I have a case of that again as a senior in college.

At work, one of my coworkers is leaving (actually already left) work, the country, and his current life to go backpacking through South and Central America. I keep thinking how nice it would be to be able to get away like that, especially these days. Sometimes, I just get sick of hearing "bailout", "recession/depression" mentioned everywhere... Imagine getting away for 1.5 years and not worrying about any of the current issues. I wonder what will have changed in the world by the time he gets back.

On a related note, I watched this news show once documenting the kidnapping of 3 CIA agents (or something) from a mission to Columbia by some huge Colombian rebel group. They were held hostage in the jungle for nearly 5 years before they were rescued, and the one thing that I always remember is one of them saying ipod's hadn't been invented when they disappeared and when they came back they were like mp3 WHAT?!?.

Moving on. Currently, I'm sitting in my room staring out at the drab sky and feeling somewhat sickly thanks to this HORRID flu that's been going around. So my neighbors across the street are a really interesting group of people, either they are a huge extended family living together or they have a bunch of renters sharing one house. There must be at least 12 people living in that house (including children). Anyways, what's most interesting is their favorite past-time...they like to hang out in their garage. ALL of them. Its not like the normal hanging out in the garage session ...you know the type where you move the car out for a few hours and lounge around, maybe have a mini bar-b-q...I've seen many people do THAT. But this is something else. They have a complete living room IN their garage...they never park their cars there thanks to their ample driveway... so they've basically cleared out the garage and made it into a sitting area.

They have a card table with a few chairs, a refrigerator, a huge rug sits in the middle of the floor i guess if someone wants to bring a pillow and take a nap (?!?!), a small tv (the very old kind that you have to turn a dial on to switch the channel), umm a shoe rack and a coat hanger. And unfortunately as I started typing this they've closed the garage door (CRAPola), so I can't remember what other treasures lie inside.

Promise, I'm not a creeper or anything I only know all these things because they have that door open all the time and they just lounge around, smoke, watch TV, eat....etc. It's like their little clubhouse I guess.

I always wanted a clubhouse when I was a kid or a "boxcar." I used to read this book series called Boxcar Kids (I think), it was about a bunch of friends that hung out in an abandoned train boxcar...I thought it was SOOO cool. Thinking back to it now, that sounds creepy...REALLY creepy.

I'll leave you on some random notes (not that the rest of the post hasn't been random thus far), there are a lot of weird things being fed to children through the media if you think of it. Here's one example:

Ever watched Winnie the Pooh? Yea I didn't either but I've seen enough clippings of it to know some of the characters. One of them that's really disturbing to me is Eeyore. Can't remember him?? Does manically depressed donkey ring a bell?

So, he sings this song "Nobody wants to be my friend" and it goes like "Nobody wants to be my friend, except for....." and then he goes on listing the 23892348 friends he has, but he still feels "sorrow." Whatever happened to counting your blessings donkey?!?!?

Winnie is another story, all he ever talks about is getting those "honeypots." He's such a single-goal oriented person...err bear. What happened to teaching kids about exploring their options and being well-rounded... though I guess he IS physically well rounded. Also, what type of bear eats only honey? Last I heard they're more into the bees that make the honey...and umm umm fish ...and PEOPLE.

Speaking of dinners, haven't had mine yet so talk to you later!

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Photo entitled Curves originally uploaded on my Flickr by me =).

At Immigration in Detroit

Officer: "India, huh? Didn't you girls miss a lot of school?" in the voice adults do when talking to kids.
Me: "No, we go to school there. Med school. :D"
Then he flipped over to our passports. I'm sure the dates 1986 and 1987 were a shock to him. He didn't ask anymore questions. Awesome.

I look like a kid. Someone help me out here. How are my patients going to trust me?

And the guy at the restaurant who thought my friend was taking her 16 year old sister {me} out to lunch. To be fair I thought he was 28. he was 19, Two years younger than me. My bad.

And the woman at the airport who asked my mom if it's okay if she checks her little girls.
How old are you sweetie?
21.
Oh. Whoops!

It's really amusing and has it's advantages. We the main one being when I'm 60 people will think I'm a lot younger. Anyways I have ADD.. and am tired.
Peace

Watch your back, CC, I'm coming for ya.

Wouldn't it be sweet if plane seats were like this? These are MOVIE THEATRE SEATS. They recline a full 180. They were advertising the seats and I wasn't supposed to go behind the tape and actually sit in them. Good thing I got a pic in before security yelled at me.

Do you like my Indian clothes? I like red. :)

I'm so excited for bagels.

And Coldstone.

And the gym.

And instant hot water.

And drinking water straight out of the tap instead of getting special typhoid and parasite free water.

And HOPEFULLY THE SNOWWWWW.

PS - don't ask what I did to my face.

PPS - If you are confused, I am going home for a little bit. :)

PPS - If you don't get the title, please read about it HERE.

From me, with Love

Dearest Michigan weather,

Make up your FREAKING mind!

This hot and cold thing you've got going on is even more aggravating than Katie Perry's song.

The month is April. The season is Spring.

But it doesn't look or feel like either.

I'm not saying I want it to be scorching hot. I just want it to be warm enough that a hijabi, such as myself, can be comfortable.

What do I mean by this, you ask?

Well you know how, Islamically speaking, Muslim females should cover their entire body, only revealing their hands and face?

And while doing this we should also be dressed modestly, i.e. no hip hugging pants and not borrowing our baby sister's extra small, extra tight shirts.

Basically wearing LOOSE fitted clothes.

Well most of the time wearing loose clothes entails layering, right? Right. And by layering I mean, we have to buy dresses/shirts that require us to wear something on top of it or underneath it, to cover our arms, chest, and/or our posterior.

I want that kind of weather. Where it's cool enough for us to layer but warm enough for us to wear flip flops. Cool enough that we can wear cute spring jackets. And warm enough that we wont die from dehydration and a heat stroke.

You know what I'm saying?

Is that SO much to ask for?

Not to mention, I NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED to go shopping for summer dresses like these:

(We would "halalify" them of course with cardigans and/or undershirts. And pants even.)

(Halalify- the slang term to describe the act of making something halal or Islamically permissible)

These are the best things to happen to Muslim girls since tunics!!!

Remember these?!!!

Anyways, I love you, Michigan, you know I do.

But if you want me to stay here for the rest of my life, you gotta reciprocate that love via the weather.


Yours truly,


-A person who wants you to cooperate with her so that she can go shopping for adorable summer dresses ,even though she is on a really rigid fixed income


P.S. These dresses can be found on the Victoria Secret website.

P.S.S.Just an FYI though, they are ridiculously overpriced.

P.S.S.S. Why has everyone dubbed tunics as being "out of style". I say to heck with everyone.Let's bring back tunics!

Reflections on Muslim Youth

This past weekend I was a counselor at this Muslim youth conference held by members from the various Michigan youth groups. Imagine a weekend filled with lectures, workshops, and bonding activities with 250 Muslim youth ranging from age 12-19 and more than 30 counselors! It was quite a sight…especially when everyone was entering and leaving the Hyatt every morning and night. We had heads turning like fans on high speed. Okay maybe not on high speed…but you get the point.

Anyhow, usually I’m usually not a huge fan of these conferences only because they are really mediocre and plain content-wise. The topics discussed are predictable no matter what the theme.


• Renewing intentions
• Struggling for God’s Cause
• Having good character
• Restraining from Sinning
• Repentance
• Humility
• Treating parents with respect
• Patience
• And of course…the infamous “Gender Relations” workshop where everyone gets to pour their little hearts out about how hard it is to stay away the temptation of the opposite gender.

Actually, the conference is really cool when you look at the topics in retrospect because it addresses the struggles of the Muslim youth here in West. One of my favorite topics to study is the struggles or challenges facing Muslim youth in the West…because everyone is having the same issue: how do I maintain my Islamic and American identity as one?

To some people it seems really difficult, like the two are almost impossible to converge. But that’s wrong. Just look at me and CA…we’re always talking about how American we are. Probably because we’re not boaters. =D

No, but really. What does it mean to be a Muslim youth? And what does it mean to be an American? To be Muslim in laymen terms is to submit completely to God to earn His Pleasure and to ultimately enter Paradise if we successfully fulfill our purpose of worshiping only Him. Personally, I think it’s such a simple concept. God has created this universe and everything in it and we must worship Him because no one else can have the status that He does as the Creator and Originator of everything. To be American in laymen terms is to have the freedom to do what you aspire to accomplish and reach in your life.

What if I aspire to be an awesome Muslim citizen in the US? I’m fulfilling both ‘identities,’ right? Exactly.

So where does the problem come in? Pop culture, at least I think so. Pop culture is actually not something unique to us Americans. You’ll find it everywhere you go, even Muslim countries. The issue here about whether you believe following pop culture is part of your American-ness. I personally don’t think it is. I don’t listen to the latest jams about lust and desire, or watch movies filled with sexual content, or fall into consumerism, buying every new Abercrombie tee or Hollister jeans. I don’t swear, or rebel against my parents thinking its civil disobedience, or sneak out of the house at 12 am to go to a party filled with drugs and alcohol. I don’t have a boyfriend, play beer pong, or go to the mall all the time with my friends as a pastime. Does abstaining from these so-called ‘funs’* make me less American than my birth certificate claims I am?

No.

Because I choose to uphold my Islamic values and I’m proud to say that I have the American freedom to do so. Thus I can confidently say that I’m a Muslim American without any contradictions.

So what does all this have to do with the kids at the conference I was at? This conference was trying to teach these kids (boys and girls) that you can be you and you can be American and you can be Muslim at the same time. They’re not mutually exclusive. Because if you think about it, who will your peers respect more? The religious kid who is nice to everyone or the kid who is a slave to pop culture and is cocky about it?

Okay I have so many other reflections from the conference….things I learned from my 15 year old girls over the course of the weekend. But this post is getting too long...so maybe another day.



*Pop culture totally limits and constricts our image of “fun.” Pop culture tells us that going to the movies every weekend is fun. You know what’s funner (and way cheaper)? Playing Apple-to-Apples and drinking virgin mojitos with your girlfriends on a Friday night. =D Pop culture tells us romantic dates over candlelit dinners are fun. I think sitting out at night on my roof staring at the bright stars with a good friend is fun. Just ask CC.

Dear Controlled Chaos

Consider this your last warning.

I don't think anyone has seen your bedroom. Sure, I've been over tons of times but never upstairs. I'm not a nosy person but you make everyone curious when you threaten them if they even think about going upstairs. {If anyone has seen her room, please inform me right away}.

This is the final straw. I WANT TO SEE YOUR ROOM. Last time I was messing around and started to run upstairs. Do you remember what you did? You almost killed me! Folks, the woman grabbed me by the ankle and almost tripped me on the stairs.

You are psychotic.

Is it a messy room? We all get messy sometimes. One time the cleaning lady refused to clean my room when I was younger because it was too messy. She took one look at the room and and instantly refused.

Another time my room was so messy that I had to create a pathway around my room by clearing away clothes, books, etc.

Anyways, I'm going upstairs this time. And if you resist I will sneak up there and take a picture and POST IT ON THE BLOG. And if you delete my post I'll POST IT ON FACEBOOK AND MAKE MY PROFILE OPEN TO EVERYONE. AND TWITTER AND EVERYWHERE ELSE HUMANELY POSSIBLE.

This is a fair warning. You have three days.

Get ready, 'cause here I come.

Your friend since the seventh grade, and maybe even the first friend you made when you moved from Saudi Arabia,
Falling Up

PS - NO AMOUNT OF BUBBLE TEA CAN APPEASE ME. *shakes fist violently*

Just my $0.0299999998

It always interests me to find Muslims that describe themselves as "liberal" or "conservative" or identify with one political party or another... or classify themselves by the accepted political and economic dispositions.


Some corporatist white fat guy in a suit, or neo-feminazi chick (I made that up but think of the evil psychologist, Dr. Faxx from Robocop 2) came up with new phrases like, "moderate muslim" and "secular Muslim", "civil democratic blah blah" and I see people buy right into it. 'Separation syndrome' or something, if you will.

It ought to be noted though, that Islam is a complete religion that lays out guidelines for every aspect of life, including the socio-economic-political realm. As God in the Qur'an said to His beloved Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) and to us: "This day I have completed your religion for you, fulfilled My favor upon you, and have chosen for your way of life, Islam." (5:3). Today we have a distorted picture of it all, thinking that "islamic governments" are just characterized by oppressing and punishing women and hindering technological advancement (ironically it is the civilized West that keeps bombing countries back to the stone age, but that's another story). It is widely ignored and forgotten that once upon a time, an Islamic Empire existed, once a meritocratic government that created prosperity and destroyed the gap between the rich and poor through mandatory charity (a time existed when you couldn't find a single poor person in North Africa), used taxes for public services alone(!), and led the world in advancement. This empire came to a gradual decline through outside and inner corruption (root cause: greed <--worth clicking), until the empire fell and was divided into the borders we see today, upon the close of World War I. Well, despite the misrepresentations of Islam-based governance and economics, I make it known that this is where I lie;

• Political views: Muslim
• Economic ideology: Muslim

This in turn gives me the belief that ALL of today's economic and political problems can be solved by restoring moral legitimacy in our systems.

Anyway, I really just wanted to share an excerpt about economics in Islam (you know, just in case you thought "islamists" were a bunch of commies or somethin'):

In Islam the market is to be free and permitted to respond to the natural laws of supply and demand. Thus, when the prices became high in the Prophet's time and people asked him to fix prices for them, he replied, God is the One Who fixes prices, Who withholds, Who gives lavishly, and Who provides, and I hope that when I meet Him none of you will have a claim against me for any injustice with regard to blood or property. (Reported by Ahmad, Abu Daoud, al-Tirmidhi, Ibn Majah, al-Dari and Abu Y'ala.)

With these words the Prophet of Islam (peace be on him) declared that unnecessary interference in the freedom of individuals is injustice. If, however, any artificial forces, such as hoarding and manipulation of prices by certain merchants, interfere in the free market, public interest takes precedence over the freedom of such individuals. In such a situation price control becomes permissible to protect society from greedy opportunists, for the above hadith [prophetic tradition/narrative] does not mean that price control is prohibited regardless of the circumstances.

If price control compels people to sell their goods at a price which is not acceptable to them or denies them the reasonable profit permitted by God, it is haram [prohibited/unlawful]. If, on the other hand, price control establishes equity among people, for example, by forcing sellers to accept a price equal to that commanded by other comparable commodities, it is allowed—and necessary.

The hadith cited above relates to the first type of situation. Accordingly, if merchants are selling a commodity in the customary fashion without any wrong-doing on their part and the price subsequently rises due to the scarcity of the commodity or due to an increase in population (indicating the operation of the law of supply and demand), this circumstance is from God, in which case to force them to sell the commodity at a fixed price would be unjust compulsion.

In relation to the second type of situation, should the dealers in a commodity refuse to sell it, despite the fact that people are in need of it, unless they secure a price higher than its known value, they must be compelled to sell it at a price equal to the price of an equivalent commodity. Price control here is in conformity with the standard of justice demanded by God. (Refer to Risalat al-hisbah by Ibn Taimiyyah, as well as to Al-turuq al-hikmiyyah by Ibn al-Qayyim, p. 214 ff.)

Source:
"The Lawful and the Prohibited in Islam" - Yusuf Al-Qaradawi ( <- I don't agree with the entire book's/author's message on other issues, but the excerpted part will do.. although the author conveniently ignores the issue below... hm)

It should also be noted that in addition to establishing free trade, Islam prohibits all forms of usury (what we call "interest"). Today's global economy is an interest-based economy. This is a widely accepted, and widely ignored problem that burdens society. In Islam, usury is seen as a false way of multiplying wealth at the expense of the poor who often can't pay it back. Eliminating interest from the system shortens the disparity between the rich and poor- this gap is continuously increasing in today's interest-based world. Such a measure also reduces distortion in the projected prosperity of a country (*ahem* e.g. America)-- leading to increased unemployment, debt, false inflation, and recession. Eliminating interest would also put the legitimacy back into the value of money as "a medium of exchange for real goods and services, [which, through interest] becomes increasingly usurped by the rising significance as means of accumulation of might. This [power] is not subject to any 'falling marginal utility'; the might over the compound interest mechanism can be built up without expense beyond every limit" (quote from http://userpage.fu-berlin.de/~roehrigw/probst/english/aberrations.html).

Central to Islamic economics is the effort to limit the illusion that money is 'power' (whereas money is merely a means for trading things of use), through prohibition of interest, hoarding, and stressing the moral obligations of human beings to avoid debts and dishonesty.
In fact, the longest verse in the Qur'an (2:282) concerns transactions and debts!

The Qur'an on interest (a few of many references)*:

And eat up not one another's property unjustly (stealing, robbing, deceiving, etc.), nor give bribery to the rulers (judges before presenting your cases) that you may knowingly eat up a part of the property of others sinfully (2:188).

"O you who believe! Stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah [God], even though it be against yourselves, or your parents or [family], be he rich or poor, Allah is a Better Protector to both (than you). So follow not your own lusts, lest you may avoid justice, and if you distort your witness or refuse to give it, verily, God is ever well acquainted with what you do." (4:135)

And this must constantly be reflected on:

"Whatever you pay as interest so that it may increase the wealth of people does NOT increase in the sight of GOD. As for the charity that you give, seeking with it God's good pleasure, that is multiplied manifold."(Qur'an 30:39)


Today I see this situation loud and clear, and I provoke you towards charity as a wise investment. I also wish to provoke the Muslim readers to scale in as "Muslim" on the so-called economic compass. Or at least, I hope this turned out to be some good food for thought! Just imagine... Imagine no possessions/ I wonder if you can/ No need for greed or hunger/ a brotherhood of man./ Imagine all the people/ sharing all the world. /You may say that I'm a dreamer... lol

Thanks, whoever made it this far!




*Another striking verse is 2:278

Friday at the store

You know how last time I told you guys about the 70 excuses thing?

That in Islam you're taught to give people 70 excuses for their behavior or actions or whatever to deter you from thinking badly or wrongly of a person. Well anywho, I'm glad I did that post.
Just because of that post, and your guys' comments, I've been doing it more and more often.
Yay us!

For example the other day, this person was driving like 20 miles per hour or something on the freeway. And as usual I'm road raging " ARGH" . Then all of a sudden I stopped and remembered the post and the 20 excuses thing, and I was like, 1. He's probably a new driver. Just like how I was once upon a time. AND I immediately felt bad, and stopped raging at him.

Poor guy. Now I just feel bad for him.

Well, today I was at the mall, working at our family store. The store is usually dead, and I like keeping it that way. The thing is, I don't really ever remember the prices for stuff, and I'm usually too lazy to actually do any selling so I prefer if customers don't come in, pretend to be interested, ask for prices, make me move around and then leave.

So there I was sitting in the store, and this guy comes in. He looks around for like a good 20 minutes. He comes up to me,
"Do you have any Lion paintings?"
"I know we did. But I don't think we have anymore"
"You're telling me you don't have Mufasa?"

Ummm what the heck

"Haha yeah. I mean did you look through the paintings?"
"No, I'm too scared to touch them"

I walk over and start flipping through the velvet paintings.

"I don't see any lion paintings. Man I love lions!"
"Hmm you're right. I guess we don't have them anymore"
"HOW could you people not have MUFASA? I mean COME ON. It's MUFASA!"

Maybe it's cuz he doesn't exist!

"I'm sorry. We don't have anymore Lion paintings"
I walked back over to behind the counter. And the dude keeps going on about Mufasa.

Eventually I tell him, I can try and call and find out. I talk to my dad, he says we don't have any left and can't do special orders right now.

I tell that to the guy and he says the store needs to shut down.
...I would have taken that offensively if he didn't seem to light-hearted.

He looks at me, "Are you a Leo? I'm a Leo. You would know what I felt like if you were a Leo."
"Sorry no I'm a capricorn"
Then he tells me about what his mom and sister are
....
Then he stops," What track was that? What CD was it? Can I buy it?"
I go in the back and check, and tell him, that he can buy it.
"Play it again for me. I'm really upset there's no Mufasa"
Really. I'm about to kill myself. But I'm starting to get suspicious so I walk over and casually put my laptop under the chair.
I come back

"You on facebook on your laptop?"
HUH
"Um. No I don't do facebook"
"Haha She don't do facebook."

WHO are you talking to?

"What do you do?"

Why do you care?

" Twitter"
"Haha. What's twitter?"
I don't get what's so funny but I tell him about twitter in the shortest way possible.

"Hmm well I have a (insert weird japanese sounding word. Boko or something) space"
"Um what's a (insert weird japanese sounding word. Boko or something) space?"
"It's like a scandalous facebook"

Oohhkayyy. This guy needs to leave.

"Like you can't be married or have a girl friend. And be on Boko (?) space. It would be like cheating"

Ok I don't like where this is going.

"You know what I'm saying. Hahaha"
"Hahaha"
No, I really don't and nor do I want to.

But the dude doesn't get that. He goes on to tell me about how, the girls on there are crazy, and about how the guys on there (according to the girls on there, cuz he doesn't know himself) are CRAZY. The girls are super aggressive, then he said something about booty-calling, and guys being blow joe's and I don't even know. But I felt as though he was trying to censor himself while he was talking, because when he was describing the people (because I asked him to) he kept on pausing and seemed to be searching for a cleaner word.

Then he starts talking about his facebook, and how he's a lot more cleaner on it, and would never cuss on facebook, but if his sister ever sees his boko (?) page he would immediately delete it. Then randomly in between he would ask for the prices on things.

This other guy comes in and starts wandering around. I'm keeping an eye on the other guy, and the dude I'm talking to starts pointing and asking for prices on things behind me. I respond, making up prices, while watching my customers. (All of a sudden all my mom's experiences with when things would get stolen from our former leather store start haunting me. Where one guy would distract and the other guy would grab the stuff.) Still, I'm refusing to think anything then to be cautious. So I try doing 70 excuses.

1. He's one of those people that talk non-stop
2. He loves Mufasa and might die without him
3. He wants to make friends wherever he goes
4. He thinks I'm interesting (HAHAHAHAHAHAHA)

Eventually after a long time the second guy leaves, and I chastise myself for becoming suspicious in the first place.

The dude however, makes himself comfortable, leaning against the counter, telling me about boko(?) space and Mufasa and God knows what else.

Eventually another lady comes in, and needs help with the t-shirts. I go over, and the dude goes over to the pictures and starts looking through them. The lady wants me to find her a XXL. We find a XXXL. She decides to buy it. I turn around and the dude is gone. Just like that. He was gone.

After the lady left, I couldn't help but keep looking over the pictures. I wondered if one or two might be missing. Even though I kept telling myself I was being disgusting, I couldn't help and wonder. I never ended up checking as a punishment for even wondering if he took a painting. He was a nice guy, weird and way too friendly, but nice.

And we get all kinds of people at our store.

Interesting customer 2 was this guy that I didn't even notice was standing in front of me. I freaked out. He had an accent, hispanic maybe. Five seconds of looking at him, and I realized he was really good looking. He could have been Native American. I don't know if he was hispanic or not but he was good looking. I haven't seen a good looking guy like him in real life before. He left really fast. I think the prices scared him away.


Interesting customer 3, was this Asian guy. Right before he left, almost like an added thought he says, "Your hijab is very pretty". I'm somewhat thrown off that he knows the word, which I think was part of the reason why he said it, but I just respond my saying, "Oh. Thank you". Maybe I should I given him oohs and ah's for knowing that we use the word hijab (Hee- Jab) to describe our scarf. But I was too lazy. I felt bad for not encouraging him though.


P.S. I know my posts are long. I'm working on trying to fix that. .....somehow......

Trust me, I'm a {shoe-less} doctor

So this morning I was walking along a very muddy path when my sandals decided to break. They were the thong type since I refuse to wear closed-toe here, except while running on the treadmill. And they're cheap because I don't believe in standing for 3 hours straight in stilettos or anything cute, because pretty shoes are not worth wearing to school.

*gasp*

I know.

Good thing my driver was right there with the car.

Good thing my sister thought her shoes were going to break any second and brought an extra pair.

Good thing my sister and I are the same shoe size.

ps - I like my driver now. He's grown on me. But he weighs less than me so I'm kind of jealous.

pps - Are you loving my random photos? My sister and I rediscovered Jenga. It's so much fun. :) I challenge all of you to a game. You will lose, hands down. :D

pps - I'm not even done typing and I'm PSing.

Always carry and extra pair in your car. You never know when you'll need it. And people always break their shoes here. I'm not the first. I can name about 5 people who have broken their shoes this year, some more than once. Quality, people. Invest in good quality shoes. Mine were two dollars. But lasted two years. And everyone thinks I get my shoes from very expensive places. I don't. I guess my feet are doing a good job of making me look classy.

-------

So we started our rotations again after a break. I know someone's going to ask me what they are. They're basically spending time in the hospital learning how to examine the patient and take a proper history of the patient. We then present the cases to the doctor and he critiques us and tells us what we did wrong and what to look for in that particular disease, etc. It's actually very helpful. Few people participate because most of the doctors are scary. They think scaring and being mean and telling you that you'll amount to nothing if you don't study is the best way to teach. NO IT IS NOT. It just makes me avoid presenting cases so that I won't have to face Dr. Meanie.

Anyways, in one year from now I will be a doctor. God willing. If I pass. God Willing. I always wonder if I'll be a good doctor or not. Not in India. My Hindi has improved but it's definitely not as good as my English and interacting with an English speaking patient would be much more easier. Plus the slang here is so different. You'd have to grow up in this city to know what the patient means when he uses certain phrases or words.

But aside from the language barrier. I wonder if I'll be great. I wonder how I'll tell patients bad news or deal with their deaths, etc. It's really scary being "in charge" of someone's life. I know ultimately it's God's decision on whether the patient lives or dies and disease is just an excuse to go. But thinking about it scares me.

Who am I? WHO AM I?

Controlled chaos/CC here people

I feel like its been a century and a quarter since I've written anything. Or maybe it just feels like that to me since I have another blog now and update it almost daily.

Let me tell you. It is QUITE annoying having two blogs (F.Y.I Quite= VERY, VERY, VERY). I don't know how some of you do it. Anywho, so I keep checking this blog and keep wondering, does anyone miss me? Is someone gonna ask, "Hey, where in the world is C.C.?"

And then I'll fall down and grace all of you with my presence. Dressed in sky blue, one foot slightly higher then the other, with a shinning light, and music playing, attached to a wire and a safety net below me. Then one of you will gasp and point toward this glistening being descending, "Oh my god. It's her! It's CC!"

.....ERRR NOT quite like that.....More like

Only without the whole being a man part......

But NO. That never happened. None of you dear followers even realized I was MIA.

Whatever (btw there's a couple of you that I'm thinking specifically of right now . Please keep an eye out for a comment that will say something along the lines of, "I hate you" or "Hi" or "Not that you care but I'm alive and floating in my boat" sometime soon in your next posts)

So in Islam you're supposed to do this thing where you give people 70 excuses for their behavior or actions, to prevent you from forming negative/bad conclusions or opinions of people (Which we all need to put into practice a lot more..like A LOT more...girls and their gossip...I don't like how they both start with 'G'). Like for example someone is being really rude to me, so instead of getting annoyed and ranting about how rude and terrible she is, I should consider things like maybe something is going on at her house, or she had a really bad day or something. Like 70 of them. (I usually stop at 10, and pretend its 70 and start going off....sigh)

So excuse number uno (1 for all you spanish challenged individuals): I wasn't really gone for a while so I alone felt that way because of my other blog.

2. There are so many authors on this blog that you didn't even notice that I didn't write (....here's a shovel, please start digging your own grave)

3. There are so many authors on this blog that you thought that we are all supposed to be taking turns disappearing and re-appearing.

4. There are so many authors on this blog that you're just plain confused

5. .....Dude I give up.

Considering that, what appears to be a Mary Poppin's bag for endless Symphonic Discord authors', is the reason you didn't notice me gone, I shall attempt to address this issue.

I am going to tell you who we are (Yayy ! How Fun! NOW SIT THROUGH THIS)

Oooh I know let's try and do this basketball style:

Symphonic Discord, trying to accomplish its goal of becoming "the cool, new blog" (I don't know how we'd count as new but whatever), is alive and running for its second year. With ever changing layouts and what seems to be an endless supply of authors, it promises to be...uhh...something...

--------------------
Writing from India, where she has been temporarily located to for medschool, we have Falliinnnnggg UP.

"What do you have to add about Falling Up, C.C.?"

"Well. She used to hate living in India, but now I think she's gotten more comfortable there then she realizes. She usually is just missing her friends in America a lot. She's usually the nicest one out of all the authors, and is the shy, girly type. Something I'm not. Oh and the funniest thing about her is that she went from wearing flip flops when there was snow outside to blankets when it's like 78 degrees."

---------------------
Playing Power Forward, the most patriotic author on the blog, and self-proclaimed to be "awesome" at all times, we have Constructive ATTITItudddeeee

"Now C.A., I have to say is a very amusing person to talk to. Especially when you start picking up on her "God bless America" and "It's all about me/I thought we were talking about me" attitude. She's a recent graduate of teaching school, and is currently a part-time teacher at an elementary school. For her, her professionalism is her biggest asset, so that is one thing you do not belittle her on"

"I'll keep that in mind C.C."
-------------------
Next, we have newest addition to the team, YouthFUL Wisdommmm

"So what can we expect of her C.C?"

"Well Y.W. is the calmest person that I know. She says that she used to have a really bad temper but then worked on it and became this incredibly patient person. She has this great thirst for Islamic knowledge and has the greatest knowledge on the Arabic language among our authors. She'll be going to Egypt this summer to expand her studies and while we haven't seen much, we're all expecting a lot from her"

"Wow I can feel the pressure"

"Haha George. I think she'll be fine"
-------------------
She's short, she's an engineer, and creativity runs in her blood, we have ARTISTIC Logggiicccc

"She's short huh?"

"Well actually she's roughly the same height as a couple other authors on the blog. A.L. likes to go camera crazy, and capture amazing shots that you find in magazines, we've seen a couple of her shots in her posts. You should see her flickr. She's VERY, well, artistic. An area a couple of us are challenged in. She's finishing school with a degree in mechanical engineering, and is also working as an engineer. She loves cars, everything about them, and also is known as the one that can do the most and best housework. She cooks, she cleans, she likes to host parties. I just don't know how she does it. "

"Is is true that she always used to dress like a tomboy?"

"It was George. It was"

--------------------
Next up, one of the most elusive members (I say most, because you can't deny that half the authors seem to be elusive at some point) of this blog. Showing her name once in three months...PROVOking INVOkingggg

"P.I. is quite the character George. She is what I would definitely classify as definitely different. She works on a different wavelength then most people I know, but then again so do I. She's very straightforward and can intimidate people that don't know her too well and is very strong in her beliefs. She's currently a physics student and has one of the most amusing laughs that I've ever heard. "

"Wow, a physics student?"

"Yeah she's incredibly smart. She says physics helps bring her closer to God. The only thing physics brought me closer to was failing"

------------------
Known as the drama queen by C.C., she complains, she makes you laugh, and will whack off anyone who gets in between her and Edward Cullen. In Center, welcome MRS. CULLEN!

"Mrs.? Does Edward know he is married to her?"

"I don't know George. I don't know. She's the romantic of the group. There was a time when all I ever heard from her was, 'I want to get married. SIGH'. She still says it in her head a lot, but doesn't say it out loud as much. She's aiming for dental school, and has these incredible highs and lows. Sometimes you feel like her life is a roller coaster. Oh and it's very important that you don't think that she's just a "dumb blonde" ( I don't mean this as an offense to blondes. I couldn't find a better phrase), she' s actually very smart. Just doesn't know how to be smart all the time. sigh"

"Sigh?"

"Sigh"

------------------
Finally, a returning author, she does the news, the politics, the food, and has one of the best hugs I have ever experienced, we have the most versatile small forward, SNAKE CHarrrrrmerrrrrrr

"First thing that comes to my mind, when I want to describe her, is Obama believer. She and P.I. have actually gotten into arguments over the topic of Mr. Obama. She's a really sweet girl and I thought I was going to die of a heart attack when she left the blog."

"You think you're going to die of a heart attack over a lot of things C.C."

"Shut up George. The point is, S.C. is basically the intellectual of the group. She also runs on a slightly different wavelength, and not to mention LOVES making food. Oh I enjoy her posts. I learn about the world through her. She truly believes in political activism and plans on leaving us to join some pre-med college in Utah or Idaho or Iowa or something."

------------------
"Looks like we're done C.C. Job well done"
"Not quite George. Not yet"
"We have another author?"
"No. We have somebody out there"
"Oohhhh Scarrrryyyy. Who is it?"
"Somebody out there, is not one person George. It's a shared account created through which any of the authors can write from, and remain anonymous. It's also for people we know that want to write on the blog once in a while. In which case, we give them the user name and password for somebody out there, and they can contribute to the blog . So basically somebody out there, can be anybody. It can be one of us, or just somebody out there. Haha get it George?
"Haha. No"
"Shut up George"
---------------------

AND DONE!
huh I just noticed that I started with small bio's and ended with really big ones. Wow I'm still in "Hey George" mode. Ok I don't even know a George, but that's the first name that popped into my head. So my invisible friend became George.

Oh and I'm C.C. I get confused easily, I over think, I can be really, really deep or just plain dumb. I get annoyed very easily, but I can forgive easily too. I like my cat. I'm hungry. I don't really like facebook. And now we're done.

I'd Rather Be Bald

Being caught without my hijab, or head covering, is the equivalent to wearing nothing. In front of a very large audience. To me, at least. I get so frustrated when I'm not covered and some random guy walks in or there are people at the house and I don't know. I honestly would rather be bald than have men who aren't priveledged to see my hair.

Muslim women are supposed to cover in front of anyone we can potentially marry. So basically everyone except your brothers, father, grandfathers, sons, nephews, grandsons, etc. BASICALLY your immediate family including your parents and kids' immediate families and your father-in-law and your son-in-law. Oh yeah and most importantly not in front of your husband. That'd be really weird if we had to. lol.

Anyways, it's really embarrassing when I'm walking around doing my thing in my own house and realize there's a man in the room. Gasp! It's almost enough to make me tear up out of frustration. At least they were by accident and no one was at fault. All of the times I've been walked in on have been unintentional but I can't help but shaking my fist at the person. In my head. Because I think it's weird to shake your fist physically. *shakes fist* yeah I just tried it. It looks weird.

Sometimes I get lucky, my cousin will be sitting at my house and he won't notice me walking in without my scarf. As soon as I see him I make a quick U-turn and go back upstairs "do-di-do-do-doooing" to myself until I find a scarf to throw on my head.

And other times, I'm not so lucky. A little while ago I did my hair and looked delicious. And was at home. I walked out of my room to come face to chest {I'm only 5'1, so it might have even been elbow} with a rather tall man. He knew he made a mistake by coming up there without letting us know like he usually does so he quickly asked me for a prayer rug, since he wanted to pray. I didn't know what to do. I kinda of threw him a nasty scowl that said do-you-really-think-I'm-going-to-be-thinking-about-a-prayer-rug-right-now?-NO!-I-really-want-to-punch-you-in-the-face-until-you-rewind-the-situation-and-let-me-know-you're-coming-upstairs. But all I did was go, "Hmmph!" and slammed my door.

Later he apologized but..it's not the same. Good thing he doesn't live here. And good thing he apologized. Or else my evil death glare might have killed him by now. He is scared of me, though.


On a completely unrelated, but equally embarrassing note. Back in the day my cousin moved to Michigan from India and lived with us until he got a job and etc. One day I was dumping my stuff in the basement and didn't bother turning the lights on because I was just going to drop some stuff off. I turn around and see this white light coming towards me. I thought it was a ghost or something coming to kill me. So I start screaming my head off and run upstairs to my mom to tell her I almost died and there's a ghost in the basement. 10 seconds later my cousin comes up, laughing. He lives in the basement but I thought he went out. And it was his glasses reflecting what little light there was in the basement. I don't know how to scream. That was my one and only time actually screaming when I'm scared.

ps - my last few posts have been hella jerkish, I promise I'm not. Ask anyone. I'm a darling little thing. Unless you see my hair.

pps - In my other post about the gourd woman, I didn't even speak to the woman without moving her gourd out of the way. That's because she didn't know Hindi or English and I do not speak Telugu. You can tell. I suppose I would have tried but she very rudely knocked me over a few minutes before. People trample all over me. rawr.

ppps - I took the above pic at the Marriott here. It's random, but I wanted to add something pretty. :D

About Me

So... me. PI, the elusive member of Symphonic Discord. I've always been too cool for school. And too cool for this blog, and CC's love for making rules about blogging on this blog, but I'm here anyway. Some people take the internet a little too seriously, but I'll go along with it :P. I like to lurk. I don't comment very often but that doesn't mean I don't care. It's just that I am doomed to either having nothing to say, or way too much to say. I make posts and then I leave them halfway because I don't think I make sense, or I bore myself. And when I finally do post I wish I came up with something better. I feel drained by school and no longer have hobbies. But I have high ambitions involving creating a race of bionic, well-armed third-worlders. I've gotten way too into studying physics (it makes me feel closer to God) and I think biology sucks.
I often feel invisible; I'm rather introverted and never had a best friend that felt mutual for me (at least not one my mom could approve of). Funnily enough, people say I come off as intimidating and confident. I'm not sure if its really a bad thing not to have that ONE "bff", and I'm too old to worry about other people loving me the way I love. By the way, I love everyone. I'm a little bit too laid back compared to most girls I know. Life is too short to worry about every little thing (I hate cliches). The other day my dad said I was just like one of his sons. It's true, sometimes I'm the man of the house. Unfortunately I'm cursed with the high-pitched voice of a 9 year old little girl, and people don't take me seriously.

Instead of studying today, I watched this season's South Park episodes on the internet. I find their commentary on economics and the Jonas brothers to be just brilliant.

If I was a superhero I would be Daredevil, Rorshach, or the Sandman.

I think girl scouts are pushing crack-laced 'cookies'.

I have fear of dolls, and feminism. and keira knightley.

I think anything the Wayans brothers do is just plain hilarious.

and here's what I think of barack obama:

(but i am not a communist or something; i just find this a nice display of photoshop skills.)

Here are some chuck norris jokes about me:
"Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: PI once swallowed a turtle whole, and when she crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate."
"PI morphs into Mr. Myagi every tuesday, to train future karate kids"
"PI is the hidden treasure in Marcellus Wallace's briefcase"
"PI is the REAL captain planet. the original powers were supposed to be earth, wind, fire, water, RABIES.. but they changed it to 'heart' so she quit."

OK I'm done talking about me. I disgust myself :/


Lastly, a little reminder I came across about what's important, which also reflects how I feel about cultural egoism/nationalist pride:

"If God had willed, He would have made you one community but things are as they are to test you in what He has given you. So compete with each other in doing good." (Qur'an 5:48)


[Everything.. every deep conversation on religion, life, goals, it can all be summed up into doing good or not doing good.]