Friday, April 1, 2011

Soaking Up Tears

Last Friday was such a blessed night. Habib Umar bin Hafeedh, a descendent of the Prophet Muhammed, may the peace of God and blessings be upon him, a profound contemporary scholar, and an overwhelmingly wise man visited our city all the way from Yemen. I had been following him along these past two days over his 5-6 events planned in the area.

The Prophet Muhammed once said, "Seek nearness to the scholars who remind you God." And honestly this man just kept doing that. He would tell stories of people around the Prophet or He would remind us of a verse from the Qur'an and with his sincerity of sharing these simple yet profound teachings, he kept bringing tears to my eyes, especially Friday night.

After the event Chuckles jokingly said to CC, "Did you crryyy??" and CC responded defensively, "Uhh no!" (Sorry to call you girls out!) But really this conversation really got me reflecting. Why are we so embarrassed of crying in front of others?

Perhaps we don't like to feel vulnerable in front of others and we perceive tears to be a sign of weakness.
Perhaps we believe that crying is only for the weak; the strong ones know how to keep it together.
Or perhaps we seeing our flowing tears as an intimate experience, not wanting to share the moment with others.

Whatever the case, I too felt this same embarrassment as tears were streaming down my face during Habib's talk, thinking should I take out a tissue or will that attract too much attention to the tears? Then I finally just thought, forget it! I'm here; I'm being affected; I'm crying and its okay.

And it was this morning after the morning prayer as I was sitting and reflecting I came upon the question: Why did God create tears?

Maybe its to remind us of God and His control over all things. Because really, when you're crying you can't control it...the tears sort of just come as they please when they please.

And maybe its just to remind us of our humanity. Tears make a person real. Everyone tries hard to stay composed, to not break down in front of others, and to stay strong. But there's just something about seeing a person with tears streaming down their face that just makes them seem so much more real.

Sometimes I think you don't truly know a person unless you've seen them cry; seen them in their moment of weakness, a moment in which they're not trying to cloak their emotion. With that said, I suppose there's very few people I truly know then.


Sulthana said...

That was very poignant. I agree with your last paragraph, it's a sentiment I hold as well - especially about friendship - I feel you're really truly friends with someone if you've been there for each other while the other is crying.

controlled chaos said...

It's a mixture of things too sometimes. Like you said, that's when the person is completely exposed. But i disagree with you, on how you truly know a person when you see them cry, because I'm seen people cry, friends and non-friends, and that does not make you closer or understand that person completely...or at all for that matter.

It does however show you their humanity, in a different way.

Softly Spoken said...

I heard it was phenomenal!!

Baby was sick so I didn't go. Are there any Youtube/ Halaltube videos from the lectures?

I've cried in front of my true friends before.

Thanks for posting.

controlled chaos said...

* I meant will not NECESSARILY make you you may get closer or u may not have that experience of truly reaching that relationship of understanding someone.

Constructive Attitude said...

I feel like I cry over dumb stuff.

Actually, I KNOW I cry over dumb stuff.

But not always.

The end.

Misha said...

He was at my university too before he visited the States! He seems so humble, which is something that not too many scholars today can vouch for.

Btw I'm loving your guys' new layout! So refreshing and summery :)

Margie said...

Tears cleanse the soul!And I cry over everything!
Loved this post!


supreem said...

I find that tears are not an estimation of weakness but a representation of trust.